Marriage is a lifelong union between two
different individuals who choose to share their lives, dreams, and responsibilities.It is a live In Nigeria, and particularly in my culture as an Idoma man from Benue State, there are three common types of marriages — traditional, religious, and court (also known as statutory) marriage. Each comes with its own practices, beliefs, and expectations. However, after observing and experiencing the realities of all three, I have come to seriously prefer court marriage, and this write up will explore the reasons behind that preference, its benefits or advantages, and reflections on the broader question of what truly makes a marriage work.
Court marriage is a legal union recognized by the state, regulated by civil laws, and usually conducted by a marriage registrar. My preference for court marriage is not based on mere opinion but rooted and grounded in practical and logical observations. In today’s society, where issues like property rights, child custody, inheritance, and spousal protection are significant, a court marriage provides the most reliable legal foundation. It removes contradictiion and ensures that both parties are protected under the law. This is especially important in a time when marital disputes can escalate into legal battles — a court marriage provides clarity, fairness, and a sense of security.
The advantages or Benefits of court marriage are many
Firstly, it is cost-effective and free from the excessive financial burdens often imposed by traditional rites. While I respect cultural traditions, the financial expectations attached to some traditional marriages can discourage or delay young couples from getting married. Secondly, court marriage is straightforward and less prone to manipulations or disputes, as all terms and agreements are recorded legally and are verifiable. Thirdly, it promotes gender equality. Both spouses enter the union with equal rights and responsibilities, unlike in some traditional settings where the woman may be treated as secondary.
Another key benefit is that court marriage often encourages intentional commitment. It is not just about celebration; it is a legally binding decision. This formality compels the couple to reflect deeply on their readiness for marriage. It also ensures the marriage is recognized nationally and internationally, which is crucial for legal processes involving travel, work, or family relocation.Recently my brother in Akwanga Nasarawa state of Nigeria ,was denied of his international trip because he didn't do court wedding or marriage.
However, it is important to address the question: does the type of marriage determine the quality of the home? From my perspective or opinion as a pastor, the answer is no. The success or failure of a marriage does not depend solely on whether the couple had a traditional, religious, or court wedding. Rather, it depends on the character, unity, honesty, communication, sacrifice, and mutual respect between the partners. The ceremony is just the beginning — it is what happens after the celebration that truly defines the marriage.
While I prefer court marriage for its well organized structure and legal protection, I strongly believe that the real work lies in the hands of the couple. The home is built on daily and acts of love, patience, honesty, and unity.
My late father sgt.Ekojah Ochayis once said "The most expensive wedding cannot sustain a marriage that lacks Love, unity, patience, honestly and good character".I agree with him because these core values are crucial.
To those who are single and planning to settle down, my advice is simple: go for a marriage type that provides security, peace of mind, and fit in with your long-term vision. While you can still perform traditional or religious ceremonies to honor family and faith, ensure your marriage is legally registered in court. This will not only protects you but also your future children and shared assets.
conclusively,court marriage remains my preferred choice because it is secure, fair, and clear.
Again beyond the type of marriage, l suggest for everyone to focus on building a strong relationship. A successful marriage is not about the ceremony . IT is about two people choosing each other every day, no matter the challenges. above all characters is what makes a marriage last not the type of marriage or ceremony.