I have got friends, and I can body beat my chest to say that these few people are some of the best, those who keep me going and help me see that there is more to life and just what we see. I smile whenever I think about the cycle of friends I have, I smile whenever we realize that we are growing in our pace and time and I smile more when we just casually check up on each other with gist or banter of any sort. I have got great, and beautiful friends with big hearts, and I pride in being friends with them because every day they teach me and let me understand their perspective of friendship which always leaves me in awe.
A few days ago, while I was talking about life as a whole with my friends since we were together, one of them said "You've grown", you've evolved, I watch you everyday fight your demons and put behind so many things you never saw as wrong back then and even though we could not talk deep, we all understood the unsaid words and the truth about ourselves. I look at our pictures every day, and I am grateful that I came in touch with this set of humans when I did.
We've had our share of quarrels, we've seen and known each other flaws, strengths, and weaknesses, we've stood by each other and walked with each other through the fire and storms and we all came out together. I could say that we attract like minds, even though we all still have our differences because of my cycle of friends. We never go through our challenges alone, no matter how small and irrelevant they are. My cycle has taught me that learning is every day, and so I have had to learn, unlearn, and relearn, I have to understand what it means to be in another shoe, and I have understood better when people say, they are friends who are closer than blood relatives.
In as much as I have had my fair share of bad friendships gone bad or wrong, it still doesn't make me deny the fact that good and beautiful friendships still exist. I would never for any reason think or be among those who say that friends can not be trusted because they are not family members or related by blood or name all because I have read, seen, and heard people talk about what friends have done to each other.
Irrespective that I am realistic, I don't or never deny the truth those who have had a bad experience about friendship have to say about friendship because I have had a fair share of experiences but that doesn't stop me from wanting or building beautiful friendships because we need people and we will always need people to hold the fort for us while we are busy. We will need people to put in the energy for us when we are weak and have no energy, we will need people to hold us still when the going gets tough and the storm wavers about to throw us in, and we will need people to wine and dine with us when the going gets smooth and merry.
There is nothing as sweet and interesting as having friends you could wholeheartedly lay down your cards for, even to the bare minimum, and have them cover up for you, there is nothing as beautiful as having a friendship that tells you, you are wrong to your face and you know they mean it for good. There is nothing as beautiful as having friendships whose aim is to grow together with positive energy and not feel that you are competing with anyone. They inspire me to be me and better for myself.
There was a time when the news of a friend poisoning a friend out of jealousy was going around and I had too many hot takes from a lot of people when I had the time to say something about it, I said something like "I can never have such thought about my friends, the people I call Friends, I can never be friends with someone who I am conscious of or do not trust around me."
So, I tell people, the moment you start seeing me as your enemy or a bad person, do well to walk out of my life, and I do the same with whomever I start feeling that way towards. We are all not perfect but for whatever reason you lose my trust or for whatever reason I start detaching myself away from you, it shows that the friendship shouldn't exist because I no longer trust your personality or attitude as well as your actions towards me. I believe my life is only one and I would do anything to protect myself, instead of being careless all in the name of not wanting to lose the friendship that could cost my life, if not careful.
I have had to keep my distance from an old long friendship because I realized that I was beginning to look like the enemy and one who was jealous of my friend's progress, and I wouldn't want such a thought around me but in as much as we aren't best of friends anymore, I never see her as an enemy or someone to hate or carry grudges against, the bridge was broken and that is all there is to that particular friendship.
I have had a friend and over time, our friendship went south, without any reason, and for the longest time, we became strangers, for no reason, and at a point, I was the cause of the failed friendship,
and one day, we asked each other what happened, but we both didn't get a tangible reason as to why the friendship failed, we both didn't and don't still know what caused the drift between us, even though we can not tag ourselves best friends anymore, we are still good friends that can call upon each other for help whenever it arises and most times that is what friendship is all about.
I have had an altercation with someone, and I found myself for the first time, not only keeping my distance but wishing I could take back the hands of the clock, maybe I would be able to alter some things I did and not put myself where I currently am because I did put myself there because of my decision and choices.
As a realistic, even with everything happening around me, I still stand with the opinion that good friendships still exist and do exist, just like our relationship that needs work, communication, genuineness, love, understanding, trust, openness, respect, wanting or having a good friendship also requires that same energy we put into our relationship. We most times focus on others but we fail to realize that the same way we are scouting for good friends, it's the same way those people are scouting for good friends. So, let's all be ready to work on ourselves to be a good and genuine friend to someone else, as we scout for good and genuine friends.
Friendships are meant to be the bedrock, the family that is not brought together by blood but by life and our experience. Friendships are meant to create memories, the good and the bad, the ugly and the beautiful. Memories are supposed to live with us whether the friendship lasted or not because once added a tag to that individual. Also, No two Friendships are the same, so when you have good and genuine friends that make the world a better place, it's a plus one for you also, don't forget to be the friend you want someone to be to you.
This is my entry to Day 11 #Novemberinleo prompt, here is the link to participate.
PS: All photos are mine