I have never had someone who is yet alive disappear from my life without an explanation. It is always the case that they disappear entirely and perpetually. I guess that is the most painful, yet we were able to get through it.
THE LOST OF A GOOD FRIEND
Her name was Amarachi and her smiles are always as beautiful as you cannot ever imagine. I have always known her as long as I can remember, she has been there from my childhood. The news of Amarachi came to me while I was in Ibadan. I left the city of Port Harcourt to Ibadan for my university studies. It was only few months after I left Port Harcourt and it was a very sad feeling. All the while I have considered myself very strong emotionally, I guess the death of a childhood friend made me realize weak I really am.
THE LOST OF MY FAVORITE AUNTY
It was the most painful ever and thank God I finally got through it. She was not just an aunty but my second mom. It was the case that I was closer to her that my real parents at some point in my life. As far as I can remember, she is the one I grew up with. I was only told stories of how my parents left me in her care to the City of Port Harcourt to begin anew after the sharian war forced them back to my home town. Till I turned nine, I only saw my parents and two of my other siblings (the eldest and the youngest) once a year. This happens when ever they come back home for Christmas. Though things will change when I turn nine as I will join them in the city but she never stopped being my second mom. Though she never had a child but she took care of me like her own and I never joked with her either. Her death was the most painful I have ever experienced. I was Ibadan and the news almost broke me but I am happy I was to get through it with time.
HOW I WAS ABLE TO COPE
It was quite easier to get through the death of my friend Amarachi but it was certainly not same with my aunty. But then, I just had to allow myself grieve. It got to a point where I had to discard the popular theory which states that men don't cry, I cried. I when on to discuss it with my very good friend Michael who gave me words of consolation and it really helped. I did nothing more except accepting my new reality, the fact that I have lost my beloved aunty and the fact that she will never be again. It took time but I gradually got over it but entaily. Even as I write about it tears almost dropped from my eyes at some point, but it can never be compare what I felt earlier.
CONCLUSION
The loss of a loved one can sometimes seem unbearable but noting is really unbearable. It sometimes seem so painful that we think we cannot survive the pains that comes along. All it takes is that allow ourselves heal as we grieve. In some cases, the grieve might be so intensed that we might need the help of another to heal. It is absolutely okay to shear it with someone who can help, even if it be an expert.
