Sometimes life slows down in a strange way and those things that once made us happy, those things that we find pleasure in doing suddenly lost it value and meaning. We wake up to the same routines, the same sights of things we usually do, until nothing feels new anymore. This is how it has felt for me lately, a phase where everyday life seems too familiar and almost nothing excite me again.
There are days when I wake up and feel disconnected from everything around me. I hear people talking, I see movements in the house, but it all feels distant like I’m watching life happen without really being part of it. Sometimes, I just greet my family in the morning and say nothing else for the rest of the day. Even replying to friends’ messages feels like a heavy load. And it’s not that I’m angry or sad, I just that I don’t feel like talking. I find myself locking up and staying quiet for the day.
Before now, I was the kind of person who would wake up early and gather everyone for together for the morning devotion, like I used to start my day with full of energy. But these days, I can stay on my bed for hours after waking up. Sometimes, I lie there until noon before I finally get up. It’s not because I have nothing to do, I just can’t find the motivation to move. The same things I used to enjoy now feel like a burden.
Even eating, which used to be one of my little daily hobby, has lost its taste. I once looked forward to breakfast every morning, but now, I often skip it or eat late in the afternoon. It’s not that I lost appetite, it’s just that I’ve lost interest. Food doesn’t excite me anymore. Life itself feels like it’s on repeat mode and everything around me has become too familiar to stir any new feeling.
Even the way I used to organise my room is affected by this uninteresting attitude. I used to keep my things neat and organized, I couldn’t stand seeing things that are not in the right places. But now, I sometimes leave my room untidy. I will see the mess and tell myself I’ll clean it later and that later will come and I won't clean it. There’s this strange feeling of not caring, like it doesn’t matter whether the place looks good or not. It’s not who I used to be, but it’s the version of me I find myself living with now.
Even going outside feels like work sometimes. I can stay indoors from morning till night without feeling bored. I just sit there in my room, scrolling through my phone or staring at nothing in particular. It’s as if the world outside has nothing new to offer, and stepping out won’t make any difference.
Even in my relationship. Most times it feels like the spark of love that was once there has suddenly disappeared not because there was any issue in the relationship but because it feels like a daily routine, like something I'm used to. Of a truth, when the relationship was new, I love sending the morning message, morning calls, calling to check up on my partner like three times daily but now the whole thing feel like a burden. The passion to send message or morning calls isn't there anymore.
When life becomes this quiet, the mind starts to wander. You begin to wonder where the excitement went, and when exactly it left.
Maybe this is what people mean when they say life becomes routine. Every day looks like the previous one, same activities, same environment, same thoughts. And after a while, nothing surprises you anymore. It’s like walking in circles and ending up where you started. When everything starts to feel too familiar, it’s easy to lose interest, not just in things, but in yourself too.
But then I believe that sometimes, the mind just gets tired and needs space to breathe. Maybe the truth is that life will always have quiet seasons like this, when nothing feels new and every day feels the same. But I believe those moments are not the end, they’re just pauses for the soul to find its rhythm again. And even though nothing feels new to me right now, I know the spark I once had is still somewhere within, waiting for its time to shine again.
Thanks for reading 🙏