Not All Reflections Are A Walk in The Park

I don't think I did. No, I'm not going to.

Confidence, wit, competence; each are a noun. Charisma is another one but it's a lot more than a word. Each are completely different but similar. Each I respect and admire but depending on the crowd, each have potential to be perceived grievously.

Virtually. Had we talked about it in person, it never would've escalated and I'd be doing something else.

Hand gestures, facial expressions, voice tone, body language, mannerisms—communication skills. Each or one or none of those combined with idiosyncrasies, humor, not so much humor, environment or atmosphere doesn't really matter, everything's cordial with little to no effort. Removing the personal aspect of a conversation however and replacing it with a touch screen changes everything.

I spent way too much time thinking about it don't you think? Conclusion: I update and restart my devices regularly, about every day, maybe I'm overdo for one. So I left the phone at the house and reflected on what's in front of me.

The cover image is from May 2, 2021, at Sequoyah Hills Park in Knoxville, Tennessee. It's a gorgeous park that parallels the Tennessee River where all the under privileged and poverty stricken residents shack up so people like me and you can photograph their shitty living conditions. The second photo is from the same location - same position six months later on November 3.

I had five photos from that May day but never used them. I wouldn't delete them either so every once in awhile I'd almost consider writing something about how I miss the dead look but never get around to it. May 2 / Nov 3.

So I got a little carried away, it happens. Why I allowed it to happen hasn't changed. First an explanation and then a system update.

What happened was someone we'll call "Larry" for confidentiality purposes and myself were talking about our European travels. We'd gone back and forth several times. At one point we both acknowledged how unfamiliar it was to us seeing teenagers drinking beers and smoking cigarettes in EU pubs. I specifically mentioned Greece, he mentioned Germany.

We went back and forth a couple times about it. I searched the laws to verify we weren't imagining things and, we're not, the legal drinking age in both countries is 16.

_{Cultural differences are unavoidable and impossible to prepare for. My advice is respect them unconditionally like your neighbors grandmother and never attempt to impose your own—you're a guest. Although at first glance these differences are striking or surprising, only you think that, before you know it it's normal like fireworks on New Year's.}

Enter surprise appearance by "Not Larry."

Not Larry is native to one of the aforementioned countries so he dropped by to inform us the legal drinking age is in fact 16 years old. To that I would've responded 'thank you Not Larry' and we wouldn't be here right now. But that's not what happened. Rather than attach a link or something or inform us we understood Wikipedia correctly, he emphasized how he lived in "The West" and knows children are "drugged to the gills" there and proceeded to tell us they're all on Ritalin and prescribed whatever else he said. That's how I interpreted it.

_{My wife and I lived 30 days or more in 16 countries recently. We've heard "The West" used as a condescending reference more times than we can count. It's not our culture abroad so we despairingly turn a cheek every.single.time we hear it. I heard "That's American!" during a board game every.single.time the Irish dude or his British wife we were playing against didn't know the correct answer and it was their game. They brought it over. "The West" or "It's American" or anything insinuating the same argumentative comparison is a cop out for anyone unwilling to own the shit in their own back yard.}

So I got super defensive and more than likely argumentative which Not Larry didn't appreciate and bla bla bla bla back and forth who knows how many hours until we mutually agreed to stop behaving like children. It happened, it's over.

Until further notice, when someone uses "The West" or similar phrase in what I understand is a condescending effort to intentionally mask the bullshit in their own backyard I'll practice what I preach—turn the channel. Either that or pretend I'm anywhere else which means they've likely never been to America anyway so I'll laugh it off and consider the source.



Dear Not Larry:

_{No hard feelings.}