Parenting from the inside out. How A Deeper Self-Understanding Can Help You Raise Children Who Thrive by Daniel J. Siegel and Mary Hartzell
This book is a wonderful guide for anyone who has children and even for those who plan to become parents. It is packed with valuable information about the child's brain and the various communication methods that we can use in order to get along with the children.
I must tell you that the greatest gift that you can give to your child is to work on your own trauma and search for the root of any conflict within yourself.
Studies have shown that a parent whose trauma or loss has not been processed will most likely engage in the same type of behavior that will frighten their children and create disorganized attachment in them (Daniel Siegel)
Children need a lot of storytelling and discussions. They need to make sense of the world through you. You have the obligation to apologize and initiate reconcilliation as soon as possible if you have mistreated your child. The worst thing is to normalize physical abuse and punishments , these children will grow and and be very aggressive adults because of the corporal punishments that they have received. Education must never use force or violence.
Keep a journal in which you write down your behaviour. Notice when you react impulsively and ask yourself why. Go deep. You will notice that it is with your parents that you have a problem with and not with your child. A trigger is never new.
This is a beautiful book and I highly recommend it!
Parenthood gives us the opportunity to re-educate ourselves by understanding our early experiences (Daniel Siegel)
