Cultural Currency: Tradition, Expense, and Generational Shifts

Rethinking Mourning Customs

In a country like Indonesia where traditions are still kept close and held dear, it comes with extra costs. In the past, the older generation could afford all the expenses that come with it, however, the younger generations hold different views. With the rising cost of living expenses, tradition becomes another costly expense that one has to bear. When it comes to death/mourning celebrations, some think it has become something that breaks their bank and unnecessary spending. Specifically this mourning tradition, it doesn’t even stem from any religious beliefs, rather it comes from tradition that has been passed through generations in order to honor the dead. Hence, these days there are younger generations who started speaking out to erase some parts of the tradition that might cost the bereaved family a fortune.

Generational shifts

Recently, during my grandma’s funeral, I met with a lot of different views towards this mourning day. Even though our family wanted to keep it modest yet still traditional due to the costs, we were grateful that friends & relatives were supporting and donating quite a bit to help us with the expenses. It was the reason why we could hold a proper 7 days mourning tradition. But I also got a few messages from distant relatives that told me our neighborhood is basically one of the most expensive areas when it comes to holding funerals. According to them, there were just way too many people day & night who comes to pray and they were worried we couldn’t afford it.

The Rising Cost of Farewell

There is also one tradition that some people disagreed on and it has something to do with providing snacks and food. Thankfully, in our family we received a few donations but we still have to purchase the remaining and it costs us around $72/daily. So, just for snacks excluding the food, we spent $504 for the 7 days of mourning. Everything included, my grandma’s funeral cost us roughly, $700-800. This is why I can see how some could be vocal about it because that is quadruple of minimum salary in the city. I think without the donation and help, it could balloon to $900 and even $1000 for 7 days of mourning days.

I think these days with the current economy and how things cost, some of these traditions become quite expensive. At the same time, people aren’t as sociable as before where they aren’t willing to help with cooking or anything that involves physical work. That is also where additional costs come too. While in the past, I remembered that a lot of people would come to the bereaved family, help with cooking the food, making the snacks and try to keep the cost as low as possible.

A shift in meaning

There is definitely a shift too in the meaning of tradition especially when it comes to death. In the past, usually these death traditions were more about getting together, supporting the family as a community, and a way for people to show connectedness and togetherness. However, these days that essence itself has gone. So, it is certainly justified that some people spoke against the costly tradition because there is little value in holding it other than praying for the deceased which can be done anywhere.

Personally, I am on the unfavorable side. I am against these costly traditions that chokes us especially when we’re still mourning about the loss. It was like an additional heavy burden that I don’t think any bereaved family should be held responsible for. At the same time, since the essence of it has shifted too and lost its meaning, I think it’s quite unnecessary keeping the traditions alive. We can always pray to the deceased anywhere and even if we were to hold something similar, a day or two are enough rather than a long 7 days and sometimes, we have to serve a certain type of food or snacks. But because my grandmother was a traditional person, we respected the way she lived her life and I am sure, she wanted the last send off to be traditional too.