One of the world's most serious social issues is the lack of the right platter, it's called wrong platter syndrome and is a tragic, embarrassing, shameful, but completely avoidable, situation that I was, unfortunately, afflicted with. But, I'm pleased to say that this devastating affliction has, for me at least, been cured.
- galenkp -
Christmas gifting isn't something my partner and I do with each other much (although I was sneaky and got her something she loved this year; no other Christmas gifts other than that morning...well, never mind about that right now, that's not for the blockchain.
Anyway, Santa actually decided I'd been a good boy all year and was gift-worthy...and when I say Santa I mean myself. Yep, I'm my own fucken Santa Claus, it's so much easier that way. And my gift? Well, I decided to buy a new serving platter for when I make food platters for BBQ's and when guests come over.
I love making platters because they're so easy and I get to put a heap of different stuff on there for people to pick over as they like. My issue was that the platter I had wasn't well-suited to the task and while my platters came out ok I felt platter-envy when I saw other people's that were presented on way better serving platters far more legit than my own. I had to have one so I Santa Claused one for for myself a couple weeks before Christmas.
On new years eve, another day that always seems quite pointless to me but is a good chance to have yet another BBQ, I had a couple over and decided I'd hit them with a platter, on my new platter-serving thing. I know, it's not the best platter you've ever seen and I forgot to leave room for the fucken crackers but overall I'm pretty happy with how it turned out and it was fucken tasty...that's the main point of it.
My wooden serving platter has four little cutouts for the four dishes across the back in which I have hummus (or however it's fucken spelled), feta-stuffed olives, sweet potato and cashew dip and feta-stuffed red bell peppers. (Fucken yum to all of that.)
The next row is dates, almonds and cashew nuts, strawberries, blueberries and raspberries. (Again, a big old fucken yum to that row.)
I have camembert cheese, chedder, pickle onion crumbly cheese and a three colour cheese plus Barossa gypsy ham and hot sopressa salami on the final row. (And you guessed it, fucken yum.)
Because I'm a fucken idiot I forgot to leave room for the Jatz crackers but don't worry...they went in a side bowl and (were fucken yum).
I'm pretty happy with how the platter went and it was certainly big enough to create a generous platter; I reckon what I had on this one would have easily been enough for six to eight people to pick off after the BBQ food and as the beers and wines, gin and tonics and scotch flowed. (It was a big fucken night y'all)
I'm really pleased with my new platter, and not at all dissatisfied that it's a brand new year now either.
We sent the old one off with a great BBQ (and an amazing fucken platter) and after we kicked 2024 in the ass on its way out we gave 2025 a welcoming hug, (I'm the world's best hugger folks, I mean seriously), and my partner and I are looking forward to some new adventures, consolidating our position even more and to planning out our future together. Brand new year, brand new platter and brand new relationship plans to create as we choose...seems like a good combination.
I hope y'all have a really great 2025 whether it's a building year, a recovery year, or one in which to consolidate and launch into the next phase of life from...have a good one...and get yourself a legit platter!
Design and create your ideal life, tomorrow isn't promised - galenkp
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Image(s) in this post are my own