Levitation

I had a few minutes spare this morning to work on one of my emerging skills and while I'd not go as far as saying I'm an expert, I have to say my powers are developing quite well indeed and I've managed to progress from a few failed attempts and a few attempts that partly worked, and I'm quite chuffed (happy) about it.

Levitation - [lɛvɪˈteɪʃn]

In case you don't know what levitation actually is, it's the action of lifting something, or causing it to rise and hover in the air, and it's a lot of fun.

I once levitated one of my bosses leaving him hovering in mid air (for a little too long) but back then my powers were not as honed as they are now so he fell and went splat all over the ground below...it didn't go well for him, but it was an awesome learning experience for me (well worth the effort) and since then I've worked to develop my skills so that the next time I levitate a person they (hopefully) don't go fucken splat in a pile of broken bones, organs and blood which, as you might imagine, can be quite messy to clean up...not that I cleaned up when that boss went splat of course.

Splat - [splat]

It's the sound of something wet wet or moist (like a fucken human) hitting a hard surface with a lot of force...just in case you didn't know. If you'd like to hear it, go and find the highest building you can and jump off the top, you'll get the idea of what a splat sounds like pretty soon.

Anyway, I was practicing levitation on my Rolex.

My thought was that I wanted to have some skin in the game, levitate something I cared a lot about so I'd work harder to keep it hovering in the air; it was a smart move because I was highly motivated not to splat my watch and, to my great relief, it survived the levitation practice session.

During my practice I managed to multi-task, (us men can do that sometimes contrary to what women say), and took a photo of me levitating my watch. It's not a great photo, pretty shit really, but you'll get the idea I guess.

Have you ever levitated something? Have you ever levitated something, or someone, who went splat at the end of it? Have you even gone splat, and if so did you survive it? If you didn't you're probably not reading this post, but if you did, then tell me about it in the comments.