If I could sit down with my younger self at midnight, I would tell that small scared 'me' that I turned out to be fine, the dark is not as scary as I thought it was.
There was a time my sister said we should watch a horror movie. I don't even know why I agreed to watch in the first place. I knew what would happen after the movie ended.
I knew that when the movie would end and we would go to our rooms, the movie would replay in my head.
The worse part? Whenever I needed to pee, I would just squeeze my legs together and try to sleep. Because I couldn't afford going to the toilet.
My elder sister was a big horror fan. She loved telling my siblings and I spooky stories. And they always stayed in my head. I wondered if I was the only one who had an inner battle afterwards, because my siblings seemed to be doing just fine.
And at night, there was also this cat that always passed our fence. It always made a sound whenever it was passing, along with a meow...maybe to let me know it was here to haunt me.
My bed was closer to my window and I was scared. So I hid under my bed. And it was funny because, hiding under my bed did not make anything better because I would start thinking that someone was hiding there with me.
I slept with my mom in her room for the next days, and I would seriously beg her to keep the lights on. I refused to stay in my room whenever night fell. I wouldn't blame me, I was a scared kid then.
"The dark is not that scary. It's just a room without light. The horror movies I watched wasn't real and the latter thoughts I had afterwards was just my imaginations. That cat was just a cat, and there was no one hiding with me under the bed." I would tell my younger self this.
The fear my younger self had for the dark then did not stay with me. Now, I prefer sleeping with the lights off, I walk to the toilet at night without having to think of someone giving me a jumpscare.
I now find midnight to be peaceful.
IMAGE IS MINE