It's been a long time since I've been so affected by the turn of things around me. Have been feeling so down when I learned about what happened and have been having sleepless nights. I feel that sharing it will help me recover from it; otherwise, I'd keep mute and go about my business. It's midnight and the same feelings still hold me.
I didn’t know that keeping a friend who is the direct opposite of who I am would one day result in great damage to someone else. Recently, a close friend of mine cried to me and explained how she had been dumbed down by someone who happened to be my friend. In the course of the discussion, she told me that she trusted him because he told her that I was his friend. To my greatest surprise, the story happens to be true. Looking at who I am, I know that I am honest, straightforward, and God-fearing; meanwhile, some of my friends happen to have some weaknesses in character and value system. Therefore, these dispositions of mind made her believe that whosoever will be my friend will as well exhibit these same dispositions. Although I know that my friend is far away from these characteristics, he’s still my friend. So as a result of this, she thought that, he’s just as I am.
I wouldn’t blame her for being used and dumped, but myself for keeping someone of moral weakness as a friend. This applies to many people who keep company with people with different moral values and belief systems from theirs. This is not just hazardous, but devilish. A bad value system has a way of influencing a good value system.
I felt very sad because it is often said that birds of a feather flock together, but my case happens to be different. This ought not to be so. Therefore, I realised that people can trust those who are our friends because of who they know we are and what we stand for. So in this case, why would a morally upright person make friends with someone with moral weaknesses? What association does light have with darkness? Apparently none. So we must be mindful of those we keep as friends. The effect of this surpasses us, to those who see us from a distance. Bad choice of friendship can affect even those we’re not directly related to. Therefore, we must be intentional in keeping those we keep as friends.
I asked her why she believed all the things that he told her. Her reply was, “Because he told me that he is your friend and that you’ve known him for many years.”
This is one of the reasons I will have to checkmate my friends' list. The ones that do not portray who I am and what I believe, I will have to keep at arm’s length. People with questionable character have ways of tarnishing your image if care is not taken. I have also realised that the best way of putting aside bad friends is by putting them in their rightful position at the initial stage of friendship. This is killing the serpent in the egg. You might not know what you’ve prevented from happening in the future.