I feel old... I’m sorry, but I fell into the appealing dilemma of being in my thirties. Still, I’ve taken it with humor. Out of nowhere, one morning I woke up and felt like ten years had gone by in a simple snap of the fingers. Ever since I’ve had smartphones, coincidentally from 2014 until now, eleven years later, I’ve recorded my life in photographs. Not at the level I’ve done from 2021 until now, but I’ve definitely noticed the difference between that college girl, a lover of Paramore and Alice in Chains, wearing her The Ramones shirt, and the mother I am today, an office worker who in her free time writes and takes pictures of everything.
Vanity is not the driving force behind this post. Although I wouldn’t disagree with losing a few wrinkles I’ve gained since that distant 2014, looking at everything in retrospect, it has been better than I thought it would be. To think that in my twenties, the very idea of being a mother filled me with such overwhelming fear that even ten years later I can barely describe it properly. And here I am, both my daughter and I. I could do it and I will keep doing it. Of that I have no doubt.
As time goes by, I always fall into the temptation of playing at having a time machine. I look at my younger photos and it’s impossible not to remember the moments of that younger Christy, thinner, without stretch marks or anxiety, haha. Though coming back to reality, I’m not sure I would change anything. Maybe I would have gone out a little more. I feel like I was too strict with myself. I should have worn those dresses I knew would look stunning on me and gone dancing and just enjoyed myself. I guess the journey, the path, leaves its marks.
In my thirties, I have matured and learned so much. I dance, I laugh, I have fun, I work, and I embody so many facets of myself that I can hardly believe I’m the same girl in the photos you’re looking at. I think there was a similar trend on social media in 2024, last year, I’m still getting used to that, called the 10 years challenge. If I remember correctly, it was more vain and superficial than introspective. Still, there is something I do want to reveal to the women reading this post, especially those who are younger and therefore more insecure and vulnerable.
Life and experiences do not end after your twenties. Your thirties, even your forties, are also years full of experiences and many wonderful things. It doesn’t matter if you didn’t finish your college degree in your twenties. You’ll do it in your own time and at the right moment. Likewise, if you think you will end up alone with no one by your side, don’t fool yourself. It won’t be that way. Everything seems to move too fast in your twenties, and when you grow up, it isn’t like that. You learn to appreciate pauses and slower seasons. Less is more, and everything is done with greater attention to detail. Today, Friday, January 17, I have a date with the man I would have loved to meet in my twenties, but who I have now. Believe me, life is a journey, but it is not a sprint, it is much more like a marathon. Have a lovely weekend, my friend.