Last week, I faced significant challenges while processing my enrollment due to failing a major subject for the first time. I was unsure about how to proceed as seeking help from my friends and classmates isn't my preference. Once I initiate conversations with them, it becomes difficult for me to respond, and I often find myself the need to draft a suitable reply. This behavior is typical when interacting with people I'm not close to or those who make me feel shy.
A trait of mine is that I tend to procrastinate and only start working on things when I'm facing difficulties, often leaving it to the last day. Initially, I believed that after failing, I simply needed to exclude subjects with prerequisites and proceed with the enrollment process. However, doubts crept in, leading me to approach a kind classmate for assistance. Despite my shyness, I gathered the courage to reach out. She told me she has no idea about it that I should ask our enrolling adviser. I did, despite my shyness.
Unfortunately, she couldn't respond that day. This made me anxious as the enrollment deadline was looming, and I had only a few hours left. Thankfully, the school's Facebook page announced an extension until August 17. Feeling confident that the deadline was still distant, I further postponed my actions. I reached out to our adviser again concerned that she might have missed my previous messages after not receiving a reply the entire day.
Finally, she responded.
Her message advised that unless a warning was issued, there was no need to write a letter. This puzzled me, prompting me to consult another kind classmate who had also faced failure in a major subject last year. I discussed my situation with her and received valuable guidance, enabling me to successfully complete the process. Despite my worries about how she might perceive my question in a wrong way, I mustered the courage to approach her. She was the only one who failed last year because of her principle in life not to cheat just to pass, which I salute, so my approach might be offending to her. I was deeply appreciative of her understanding and support.
After emailing my Pre-Registration Form, I encountered difficulty receiving a timely response again, leading to frustration and anxiety. Doubts resurfaced about whether the enrollment extension was legitimate. I sought reassurance from my classmate, who confirmed its validity. With renewed confidence, I emailed the enrolling adviser again the following day and eventually received a signed PRF. Last Wednesday, I checked my portal and saw that I was officially enrolled.
Facing failure in a college subject was something I hadn't anticipated. Although the program is totally challenging for me, I've always been a diligent student since elementary school. The thought of not graduating with flying colors dampened my enthusiasm, yet I continued to motivate myself by acknowledging the progress I've already made. I pondered how to overcome or adapt to this situation, considering various factors.
I realized that my studious habits had faded, partly contributing to the challenge. Living with four classmates, I recognized too late that cohabiting with individuals I'm not close to isn't ideal. Shyness often prevents me from pursuing what I truly want. I initially believed that communal living would facilitate constant studying together, but that wasn't the case. Our group dynamic led us to become complacent and rely on last-minute cramming before exams. I had hoped to review and study at least a little each night based on the daily lessons.
The influence of the pandemic likely played a role. It marked our first return to face-to-face classes since its onset. I advised my peers, who hadn't faced failure, to approach the program more seriously moving forward. I changed my living arrangement to share a boarding house with my younger brother who's also a college student now in a different university, as my parents also sought to reduce expenses.
The allure of numerous job opportunities across various sectors—government, finance, pharmaceuticals, agriculture, education, support services, business, manufacturing, and market research —motivated me to persist in the course. The field is flexible, and currently, statisticians command high salaries in the Philippines. I eagerly anticipate this new phase of my college life, envisioning a comfortable environment where I can pursue my passions freely. Additionally, I find myself reserved around my classmates slash board mates in financial matters.
They often cover for me when I'm short on funds. I aspire to address this situation independently, as it's hard for me to live with the people I owe a lot. I consider myself fortunate that these individuals have been instrumental in helping me survive the previous semester. I'll undoubtedly miss the shared experiences—both the challenges and the joyful moments—especially the late-night conversations that we wish could go on forever.