I heard the human get up and go to the bathroom, so i siezed my chance! I sneakily hid behind the door, ready to grab his ankle as he passes, but alas he was more alert than normal. I shall try again later!
He’s out in the garden again, so i shall cunningly hide beasde the log pile and ambush him as he passes..
Dammit, foiled again! He’s too alert right now, damn him and his morning concoction of magic bean juice!
I shall take a break and plot my next move…
Wait hes coming this way?! Uh oh! I think he’s on to me! He knows im plotting to kill him and get the life insurance payout..
Phew! He just thinks i wanted cuddles. I suppose i should let him adore me for a while to throw him off the scent. Speaking of scent.. HUMAN, go and take a bath, you reek of hard work and effort, the 2 things i despise most of all!