First and foremost no hate about my Title. I do love my nieces and nephews to the bottom of my heart.

WHY I HATE BEING A TITANG INA

To those unfamiliar with the term, 'Titang Ina' is basically an aunt that shouldered the responsibility of a mother to her niece and/or nephew.

So, what's with the title?

Come on, I know a lot of you shares my sentiments. You got to admit that I am not alone here. A younger girl in a Filipino family had to endure it once in her lifetime. And it is one of the tradition if not an aspect of our culture that I hate. (Put a stress on that H word).

Well you see, I had my first niece when I was seven from my sister who is also the eldest in my siblings. Being that I am the only girl beside her, I had to endure tedious tasks of helping her tending with the little wee one at an early age because she's a single mom.

I learned to carry a baby at seven. I learned to change nappies at seven. I became a young, 'Titang Ina' at seven. But my young mind enjoyed the role at that time having a live doll as a play thing was a neat treat.

The hate came years after that first experience. It was when we had the third kid, a nephew. He's the son of my eldest brother and at that time I was thirteen. My brother and the mother of my nephew tried to work things out but they were only quarrelling all the time. They just never on the same page after my nephew was born. And when the baby was about a year old my mom just force them to split up before things worsen. The baby was left in our care because the mother could afford to take care of him.

At fourteen, an eight grade, I had to be the mother to my nephew. The baby sleeps with me at night which means, I need to feed him at night. I rarely get enough sleep at night and I wake up at 4AM the next morning for school. It was frustrating, I always find myself crying and begging my mom to give the baby back to his mom.

The notion of going out after school was far fetch to me because I had a wee one to take care. I had missed a lot of school events because there's no one to take care of my nephew. And even Christmas Parties or Birthday Parties were out of the question sometimes. I would often tell that I was sick to get excused from such events and it just came a time that I was branded sickly that no one bothered asking me anymore.

And when it comes to family outing or visiting relatives. I have the task of minding the kids, meaning: watching them and chasing them around the house so they won't break anything.

It was sad for a young kid and that really trampled me. Imagine a kid having to take care of a kid when in the first I also need taking care off.

And it didn't stop with my nephew because my brother had another baby. So, the struggle continued after college. And promise, to this point the cuteness of a baby does not compel me to have one. And a crying baby still sends me to edge.

It's the very reason why I refused to bring a baby into the world unless there's a concrete structure of family around it. I don't want to burden others especially the younger family members of my obligations. I had missed out a lot from my childhood because of this and I shan't be doing the same to someone.

If you cannot take care of a baby, don't have a baby period.

Though I'm trying my own now and I promise to take full responsibility.

All images included in this article are owned by the author unless stated.