You were never the first love I had, but you were the one who kept me warm. At first, I only enjoyed our funny and silly antics, our conversations til I heard your beautiful sexy voice. I was thinking for my self like "She's alright".

I never really wanted to be in any relationship back then, I never really believe in love at all. I think it's just another baggage to carry. Until you came in. I remember how we were comparing our lives in two different world, different culture, different state of mind and yet we found our same ground, we found our selves for each other. As we said to each other we're like Fire and Water, Heaven and Earth, Above and Under, the Yin and Yang. Two different entities that would always be different, but can never separate to each other, always pairing like an eternal bond.

I remember our first date, We went for a jog around BGC, and as you're as competitive as I am, you were always up for the challenge, and as we start walking to warm up, the sun met with your eyes and first thing I asked you, "Are you wearing contact lenses?" with the response "No, why?" and replied back "Nothing, your eyes, they're just.. so brown. they're pretty". Right there and then I was speechless, I was already attracted to you, it was funny for you to stop to remove the jersey you're wearing before the first run, just so you can flaunt yourself to me. In my head I was like "Lol, yeah don't worry I like you already". After that day, you kept messaging me the whole night, thinking I didn't like you back, I had to calm you down by saying how I thought about you that day.

You have the most amazing energy, The Prettiest eyes, and gorgeous smile, you seem too perfect for me, we even played basketball together that was the first for me and of course, I always let you win. Just how much I let you win in every arguments, in any fight. You've tested my patient so much, that one time I couldn't take it anymore and punch a wall broke my wrist and pull it back together. Fights and arguments kept piling up until we start to grow apart. I was always the calm one and always the one to fix things for us. From one of your sorry note.

I guess I'm only human who has its breaking point. I guess I wasn't strong enough to keep up together. I guess I broke the promise I made for both of us. In the end, I gave up too much of me and I couldn't collate my self enough and just silenced my self to you. I thought to my self:

Now, I'm just looking back, now it's all just memories, something that I hold on to until now. As we turn new page of our lives, before the year ended you still made the effort to message me, we were both civil about it, we've both ask for forgiveness. Even though we both say we still love each other. We both know it wouldn't work right now, that if we start all over again, we'll end up losing each other again.

Our distance apart may help us grow as an individual, for now that is more important. It's a space enough for us to move freely. As we say "It is what it is, What happens, happens". Til this day you still hold my heart, and I will never forget the love that we had. If one day we meet again, then we do, If not, I will always wish for you the best things in life and I know you would do too. As I've told you, let's be better this 2023, and I hope you are safe, happy and love where ever you may be.