For some reason I don't wanna beat around the bush too much on this post. Because I truly want to keep this post "short" by sticking to the plan this time, unlike the previous so called "shorts" of mine haha. So, I'm afraid I won't have much time to dive deep, even though I really want to.
This topic about Evil has been running through my mind for quite a while now. Necessary evil, if we're being specific.
The past few years have quite relentlessly battered me down, being successful in causing some proper damage. Poking and scratching around on already existing wounds, wounds that haven't fully healed yet.
Some of the scars are still quite visible and up in my face most of the time. A part of me surely doesn't like these scars and flashbacks. Yet, even this naive side of mine has slowly started to accept, that I might have to stare at these blemishes for the rest of my life. I might even have to welcome and accept them at one point, as if they're a part of who I actually am.
Even though I must say that I've gotten quite used to it all by now. That is why the overall "healing process" doesn't take as much time anymore. So, no matter how hard I get hit, I still manage to get up on the instant, somehow.
Albeit, if I said that I truly believed that one day, I will be fully healed up, at a 100%, pure and fresh as a daisy again, then I would simply be lying.
Yet, there's another part of me, a side that I'm beginning to love as these ill-fated and cursed occurrences of life keeps on spreading.
This part of me surely doesn't mind showing off these scars, it's not ashamed of my flawed way of thinking. It would rather flex around and wear these scars proudly, it wouldn't even mind a few new additions of scars either. And it sure as hell wouldn't mind inflicting some serious damage on the ones who dare to harm my family, or even me.
It doesn't listen to reason, it's barbaric, deranged, out of control. Sadly, sometimes it seems that I'm slowly losing control over it, like something inside of me just wants to let go. As life keeps on testing my patience, it seems that this unknown side of mine keeps on growing stronger.
I just somehow want to maintain control over it, retaining a fair amount of control and some hope towards the future. A future where hopefully, things truly get better.