What would life be like away from the familiar faces! How things are going to be like living among strangers? She often thought.
The people around her couldn't give her anything other than misery; that was constant. She never fit in with others, not even with her family. Neither they made any effort to know her, nor she took any steps towards their direction. It was a mutually accepted distance. Yearning for something different or a drastic change has always been on her mind. It's quite unusual though for her; unusual due to the surrounding she grows up in. The neighborhood she's in is very homely and hospitable, the true meaning of quintessential. In other words, dull, boring, and too constricting. Come to think of it, the whole town is similar.
Hardly anything or anyone changes around here. Same old lifestyle, same old routine, and everything going like clockwork; no missteps whatsoever. Even though at times it feels like a deja vu but then she realizes it's just another day. Changes are welcoming but that's just what the surface looks like. The best that's possible is if the Wednesday attire is worn on Tuesday or an extra ingredient added to the dinner or maybe a new set of wiper blades or tyre for the car; that is all the changes that are acceptable. When she was a kid, she had a few like-minded friends but as they grew older, her so-called friends became how the rest of them are and she became distinctive. She doesn't mind standing out, although she loathes standing out alone. What she doesn't realize is when you become noticeable, it's usually because you alone have something that calls for attention.
She had thought of running away from home a million times, but she could never do it. Running away has never solved any problems but comes with the "runaway" tag, and she's anything but that. Whether she likes to admit it or not, she has responsibilities, has duties that need to be carried out. It's hard to admit that she'd chained by the very norms that she detests, but she'd break free. She'll leave, to rebel, to break free, to discover herself, to find the things that set her soul on fire.
That's exactly what she needs to do and she's sure of it. She doesn't want a pile of gold, silver, or jewels, nor the fame pulls her near. Extravagant life isn't fulfilling. What she truly desires is chances to reshape her views and opinions, to see what the world has to offer, to find a place where she truly belongs. But first, she has to plan to escape from this wretched hole. When she comes back, she intends to be an entirely new person; someone unrecognizable.
She smiles to herself.
For that purpose, she has saved up enough money to carry on for few months. After she reaches the city, she'll find a temporary job and plan from then on. Now she has to decide which courses she's going to apply to; history and archaeology have always fascinated her and she might enroll herself in one of those courses. She's aware that for the time being time is going to be extremely cruel but she won't have it any other way. No more sheltered life and only when she's out of her comfort zone can she truly start to find what she desires; her determination isn't going to falter. The courage and the willpower she lacked before are now filled to the brim; she's ready.
She knows she's ready and she can feel it in her bones. Ready for an adventure, ready for a long journey to unearth the reason for her existence. The letters, she almost forgot about them. Although it's when she'll be back she doesn't want to leave before leaving a detailed explanation so that the ones who care about her don't fret. In her letters, she explained to the best of her abilities about her situation and placed them carefully on her bedside table, right beside the lamp. She headed downstairs and opened the door. Just as she stepped outside, her heart starts to flutter; yes, it's scary but that will not stop her anymore. Crossing the threshold she turned back to look at her house one last time.
Now she's finally ready; she's free.
