Back when you were still a kid, if you were shown what your life would look like as an adult, would you still look forward to it? It's funny how we had a perfect plan for our lives as an adult but many years along the road, we find out things aren't as easy as we thought they would be. There's a lot that goes into being independent and living the life of your dreams which is different for everyone but one thing we can all agree on is that it is stressful as hell. A few months ago, I got accepted as an intern by a great tech company, with a frontend software engineer role, it is something I have been looking forward to because I'm a self-taught software engineer and I don't have real-world experience, so the internship offered that opportunity but I wasn't prepared for all the stress that came with it.
I got very tight deadlines and at the same time, I had to learn the technologies I needed to complete the task assigned to me while working on the task. Coding is now what I do most of the time, and I barely have time to do anything else, which has also affected my time here on Hive. Today is one of those days I'm free from any task, so I have just been playing video games and sampling new songs for most of the day. I was in search of new songs to add to my playlist on YouTube music and that was when I came across a song that perfectly described my current state; Stressed out by twenty-one pilots.
It was like YouTube just said, "Hey, I know what you're going through, so here is a song you can relate to." This song has been around since 2015 but this is the first time I'm hearing about it, and aside from it being very relatable, it's also a very catchy song. This part of the song; "I was told when I get older, all my fears would shrink But now I'm insecure, and I care what people think" is something most of us can relate to as it shows the difference between the expectations and realities of growing up. As kids, our biggest worries might have been about what cartoons to watch or what type of snack to eat.
But as we grow older, our worries and concerns become more complex like career pressures, financial stability, and social expectations. I remember back when one of my biggest problems was how to stay awake and wait for my dad to go to sleep around midnight so I could take over the TV and watch late-night movies, but here I am today keeping late nights and getting just 2 to 3 hours of sleep just to meet up with deadlines. It's mostly similar, considering I still keep late nights but now the reasons are different; one was very fun while the other is stressful. Don't get me wrong, I love coding but that doesn't make it less stressful, especially when you're restricted by the requirements of your employer.
The simplicity of childhood is a sentiment many of us share. The carefree days of playing with friends, having few responsibilities, and living under the protective wing of our parents now look like a distant memory. Adulthood, in contrast, often brings a barrage of decisions, obligations, and uncertainties that can feel overwhelming. Sometimes I wonder when it will end or if things will get better. I look at the current state of the economy and how crazy the job market is in the tech world and I start rethinking my chosen career paths, dwelling on questions I don't have an answer to.
I recently bought a new phone (just last week) and I felt really good about it because it is one of my goals this year. Accomplishing goals is one of the things that gives us happiness as adults, reminding us that we haven't lost touch with the universe and that despite all the stress and pressure, dreams still come true. One of the most striking aspects of "Stressed Out" is its honest portrayal of the pressure of meeting societal expectations, where success is often measured by material achievements and status. Lines like, "Wake up, you need to make money," reflect the relentless pursuit of financial freedom that dominates adult life, which also is one of the goals of most of us.
The good thing is that I have always had it in the back of my mind that it won't be a smooth ride but there is a stark difference between expecting something and actually experiencing it, after all, it's only the person who is wearing a tight-fitting shoe knows where it hurts. Finding balance in life is crucial for managing stress and that's something I realized I have been failing at, I probably have to start asking for extensions on those tight deadlines. In the end, adulthood may not always be the freedom we once imagined, but it is also a journey of growth, resilience, and self-discovery. Through the ups and downs, we learn to navigate life's challenges and find our own unique paths to fulfilment.
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Second image: personal photo