As a friendly person who is always seen smiling with everyone all the time, people assume I have so many friends. I get it because there’s this belief that friendly people make and have friends everywhere they go but the truth is, my circle of friends is very tight. And it all depends on the quality and authentic relations I have with them.
About 2 years ago, I was going through so much pain after the loss of a relative. And as one part of me truly wanted to express what was going on with me, another part wanted to keep shut. Anytime, I opened my mouth, tears would do all the talking. I heard a lot of encouraging words from so many people. I got to a point where my sadness turned into anger because I began sinking in a lot of “you’ll be fine” from many people.
One particular weekend, my friends picked me up from the house to my favorite place in the world(the beach) and we just laid down in the sand in silence while the breeze did it magic. They had what the many people didn’t, understanding. They understood me, knew what I needed in that moment and made me know they were with me through thick and thin without further drowning me in words. And as a minimalist, experiencing quality love from people you love right back is one side of connection.
The other side is authenticity. One of the things that always get people shocked after knowing me is my teetotalism. As an outgoing person, people are so quick to assume I have a thing for alcohol, after all, it is a Gen Z thing. You should see the death stares I get when I go “oh no, no alcohol for me”.
But that’s the beauty of having connections with certain people. As a minimalist journeying through life with few friends who understand me, they never judge me for not drinking. In fact, they encourage me to keep it up because they don’t just respect my decision as a person but also accept me for who I am. I never have to pretend to be who I’m not and they also don’t have to because our relationship is grounded in authenticity.
All in all, connection to me as a minimalist is all about nurturing the things that add value to your life, help you to be yourself or even a better version and brings you both internal and external peace. At the end of the day, whatever interactions I have should put me in a better place physically and even better, mentally.
Images are mine