How often have we wanted to erase the slate clean, start everything over...like none of the bad memories ever happened? We have all made mistakes we wished we could turn back time and undo. Wounds that have left scars while healing...
"Time heals everything" is a misaligned statement. It does not take into consideration the scars that forms in the healing process! Almost every physical injury eventually heals - some leaves visibly horrible scars, some scars eventually fall off and we let go of the memory of the injury. The scars that remain serves as a constant reminder of what was and what could have been.
Regardless of how successful one becomes, if we can not forgive ourselves for the past - at the end of the day on one cold night we will find ourselves letting go of a deep sigh, longing for an empty canvas.
It is easier to ask for forgiveness from the person we have or we feel we may have wronged - they may or may not forgive us. But it is often very very difficult to forgive ourselves for our own mistakes. We can make ourselves believe it's alright and we did nothing wrong. But when the dust settles, and the silence falls we go back to longing for that empty canvas. What if....
It is a difficult psychology to understand and the reason I think it happens is because we do not look into our souls often enough. We will often clean up our houses at regular intervals - declutter and throw away things we no longer need because those are stuff we can see. We fail to realize the same applies to the state of our minds too. Just because we do not see, does not mean it does not exist. And hence we do not declutter our minds, we do not throw away baggage we no longer need to carry - we never end up having creating our clean slate.
Another year has almost passed us by. Let us take the time to reflect on our souls and declutter our minds, free the soul of unnecessary baggage and have ourselves what we so long desired, An empty canvas.
