To relieve yourself of the anxiety of any resolution, not just new year's is to Keep it simple and smart Realistic! That is the key. If you set yourself a goal of landing on the sun, you'll most likely end up getting yourself scorched to ashes as you approach the sun even before you even land on it!
I know, I know, it's a stretch. No one sets themselves a goal of landing on the sun unless they're stupid like me! But the same concept applies to any unrealistic resolutions or goals, albeit in a more metaphorical manner.
Be Realistic, Be Flexible!
There is nothing wrong with setting the standard very high for yourself and trying to go out of your comfort zones, as long as they are realistic for you. So often we find ourselves succumbing to a resolution only because my next door neighbor's dog's uncle's owner managed to do it last year or is setting their resolution high up there this year. Maybe it is doable for them, you are not in their shoes. We need to have a realistic understanding of our own limits and succumbing to peer pressure of setting unrealistic goals for ourselves will eventually end up resulting in anxiety of failure - disappointment - further anxiety - giving up on the resolution altogether!
My personal method relies heavily on this concept. I will always set myself goals I think are realistically achievable FOR ME. And if at any point I find I may have overdone myself a bit, I am always willing to be a bit flexible with the initial goal. Adjusting as the year progresses is essential to fulfilling most of the way to your resolution if not the whole way. It is much better than giving up altogether. If you are Realistic, and you are Flexible, you will soon see you are no longer suffering from the unnecessary anxiety of fulfilling your resolution and you will be implementing more of your resolutions than not with much more ease.
Take me for example. A couple of months back I set myself a goal for next year - Reach 25k HP by end of July 2023.
I was quite upbeat about reaching it in time for the first few days because it really is a very Realistic goal. But soon realized I have overdone myself with the timeline. Now, I could have sulked and given up on this resolution altogether. Or, I could be flexible with the timeline to make sure I still reach it in time and don't burn myself out by trying to achieve it within a timeframe that is unrealistic for me. I know, for many this might be still doable in the timeframe mentioned. But as I said, it's about whether it is realistic for me. And I simply had to realize it wasn't. So Flexibility it is!
Not a Competition!
Understanding the fact that new year's resolution is not a competition is another important step in avoiding the anxiety. These resolutions are not to get one over someone, but only to elevate yourself a bit more than where you were last year. And these resolutions does not necessarily have to be made by the 31st night. It's not set in stone. Live in your own timeline, add more resolutions to your schedule as you see fit and don't let the peers pressure you into believing otherwise.
Another example if I may. Even till the middle of this year, I wouldn't have imagined it possible for me to EVER be able to write a post every single day for a month owing to my busy schedule and balancing post graduate studies between seeing patients. Hence it never was a part of my resolution!
But as I passed a big hurdle, a slot opened up for me to be more active on HIVE. I tested out for a few days to see if I could actually do it and all of a sudden it was a real possibility! So it got added to my resolution late October. Unfortunately I didn't know that, to get the badge for "written a post every day of the month" it takes the calender dates into consideration. So after I started, I missed a couple of days on Nov 2 and 3 I think. I thought I could just pick up and write for 30 more days straight and get it done. But the counter reset on the 1st of December and I started all over again.
Incidentally, this post will be the one that gets me that badge! Not that the badge matters, it is the accomplishment that is far more important.
It is nearly 12 a.m. here (new year comes early in my part of the world!), what a beautiful way to end the year with fulfilling a resolution I never thought I would be able to!
As the end of another year looms upon us, I find it fitting as I repeat, Sunsets are proof that endings can be beautiful too. May every one of you have a beautiful ending to this difficult and trying year. And, Happy new year!
