Hello :)
I am new here and not very good with introductions, but hopefully the things I share here will be interesting to read and possibly helpful in one way or another to those who read them.
I really like being creative and always try to find new ways to express myself. One of those things is photography. I’ve always been fascinated by it and tried learning and doing photography myself on and off throughout different periods of my life.
I won’t bore you any further. Instead, here’s part one of my story about a very important journey. Enjoy :)
P.S. Bless my camera and my lens for surviving the harsh conditions I put them through…
The Northern landscapes have always fascinated me. The dark green of the trees against the almost blue-ish white of the snow, the way the sky morphs into the ground where you can barely see the horizon, the way time seems to have stopped almost like a photograph — there was always something mysterious about it to me.
Last year in December, after almost 3 years of inaction due to several circumstances, (some of which I had no control over, some — I created myself ruled by my own anxiety and fear with a sprinkle of laziness), I have finally decided to act and fulfil my long-time dream of travelling. At the time I was already severely burnt out and stressed because of my now former job, the thought of quitting was becoming more and more real. I had no back up plan, so it was still more of a fantasy. Stress and burn out are bad, having no income in this economy is terrifying. But I wanted to escape. I wanted to go somewhere so remote no one would find me, not a single soul.
New Year’s holidays were approaching, which meant I got ten days to rest from work and do stuff. “That won’t be enough”, — I thought. After almost 6 years of working the same job I haven’t really taken long holiday, always worried something would go wrong if I left. And even while on a holiday I would still be constantly on my phone, replying to work messages and making sure things are still getting done without me. It is a very unhealthy mentality I am still trying to change. And I guess at that point I was so done with everything I was able to ignore that scratching feeling of wanting to control everything. Somehow I let myself go. And even though I knew that going back to work after a long break would be hell, I messaged my boss saying I am going on a two-week holiday before New Year’s break.
For the first time in forever I put my needs first — and it felt very liberating. I know, I am probably dramatising such an ordinary event. But for me it was something I’ve never done before.
Now I was faced with 3 weeks of freedom, time I could spend just on myself. And then I remembered that dream that used to be so unattainable before. I always managed to find one excuse or another but this time I had none. Without thinking too much (because that would have definitely led me to changing my mind) I booked my ticket to a place that is probably the definition of “the middle of nowhere”.
Located in the sub-Arctic region lays a tiny village called Teriberka. It was named after the Teriberka river, that flows through it. The name itself originates from the word “Ter” — the name the indigenous people of that region called Samis gave to the peninsula now known as the Kola Peninsula. And that is where I was headed.
The night before the flight I was very nervous and anxious, I kept thinking I should just cancel everything and stay home. I don’t know what exactly scared me. Maybe it was the fear of unknown. Maybe it was something so different from what I was used to doing. Or maybe I was so excited that I couldn’t tell it from fear. I didn’t sleep that night. There was no point in trying after a certain point, the flight was scheduled really early anyway. Powered with 0,5 litres of coffee I sat at the airport waiting to board.
Getting to Teriberka proved to be a quest. Like I said, it is a very remote village. It’s a 3 hour drive from Murmansk — the main city in the region, also where the tiniest airport I’ve ever seen in my life is. Three hours is a very optimistic estimation, because the weather conditions there are as predictable as you can imagine — they are not. But luckily for me the day I arrived there was no snowstorms and the roads were safe…ish. There’s always a chance of things changing rapidly in those kinds of areas, so keep that in mind if you ever decide to visit the Arctic.
Aside from everything around you being covered in snow, the first thing you notice once you land is that at 10 AM it’s still extremely dark. It was a very odd experience. On the plane I could see the sun rising and then slowly disappearing again as I got closer and closer to my destination.
At around 11 AM me and some other people who were also going to Teriberka got into a mini-van that was supposed to take us there. On our way we made a stop at a local supermarket in Murmansk to get some snacks and other things we might need since there aren’t a lot of stores in Teriberka. Around that time the sky started getting lighter, almost like a dawn — but the sun was nowhere to be seen. In fact, it would never go past the horizon. And the moon was our constant companion throughout the trip.
As we continued on with our journey to Teriberka, we were greeted with vast lands of just snow. I never thought that view would have such and impact on me, but as I saw it, the world around me kept getting bigger and bigger and I kept feeling smaller and smaller. Such a magnificent thing — our planet! If left untouched, unbothered by human interference it can give so much by taking so little. It’s just there to be left alone, admired from afar.
I can’t describe my initial feelings. It wasn’t just about the trip. I finally felt that I was doing something important for myself. Something that would change my life. And in a way it did. It was the first tiny step towards living.
I will tell more about the trip and that beautiful village I was lucky enough to visit, but that’s for another time :)