I get where you coming from. I am 42 now and time sure is a weird thing. Some days I feel older ( and a lot wiser which might be due to previous lives ). most days I feel way younger than my age ( which is a good thing ). At the same time, I already thought about these kind of things/ topics at a very young age. I became serious a little too young, at the same time I always countered that with my humor and I sure look younger than my age and try to keep my inner child alive.

Lovely writing.

You're not old at all but I know what you're going through.

When I was 27 I made my way to Spain, for the second time, to improve my Spanish ( in the beautiful Granada ) and end up living in Madrid for a couple of months, before I ran out of money and returned to The Netherlands, once again, to spend 8 more years there
and, finally, move to Portugal ( at the age of 36 ). 6 years have passed now and I have no idea where I will be in another decade, let alone 15 years ;<)