Today’s writing is about something I don’t always admit easily and that’s my struggle with patience especially when it comes to teaching.
Basically, I’ve been tutoring someone recently, helping her navigate a platform she needs to use. Before anything else, she had to create an account, which I helped her set up. After that, the next step was simple or at least, it seemed simple to me.
I just didn’t want to do everything for her. I’ve learned from experience that once you start doing things on behalf of someone, it becomes a cycle you can’t easily step out of. So instead, I decided it was best to guide her. I sent screen recordings, took screenshots and highlighted exactly where to click and what to do.
This is the same method I’ve used with others before her, people I never even had one-on-one sessions with. They followed through, asked questions when needed, and got the hang of it fairly quickly.
But with her, it’s been different. For over two weeks now, she’s been stuck on the same step. To be very honest, it has tested me.
There were moments I felt deeply frustrated. Moments where I wondered why something so straightforward to me felt so difficult for her. At some point, I even caught myself asking a question I probably shouldn’t have, out of pure exasperation. Because in my mind, if you can text clearly on WhatsApp, you should be able to read and follow instructions, right? Perhaps that’s where I got it wrong.
I know that understanding something intellectually and navigating it practically are not always the same. What feels simple to one person can feel overwhelming to another. And sometimes, what looks like slowness is actually confusion, anxiety, or even fear of getting it wrong. This is what I have been using to convince myself this whole time.
She mentioned having a headache at some point, and I almost laughed because in my head, I felt like I should be the one complaining. But maybe, in her own way, she was overwhelmed and I pondered on it. Patience is easy when things are going smoothly. It’s easy when people learn at your pace, when they get it quickly, and when everything aligns with your expectations.
But real patience shows up when things are slow and progress feels invisible. When you have to repeat yourself more times than you planned to. I won’t pretend I’ve handled it perfectly. There were moments I wanted to give up entirely on her, where I even considered using the block button. After all, she’s not paying me to guide her, I’m only doing it from the abundance of my heart. But then, I remind myself that I chose to help. Helping isn’t always convenient.
So now, I’m trying to shift my mindset, not to excuse inefficiency, but to make room for understanding. To accept that people learn differently. That exposure, confidence, and familiarity with technology vary more than we think.
I will still guide her and teach her as I’m also learning something in the process which is not about her but myself. About my limits, my patience and the kind of grace I am willing, or unwilling, to extend.
Apparently, the lesson here isn’t just in teaching someone else how to navigate a system, it’s in learning how to navigate your own reactions when they don’t get it right.