My weekend was so full. On the last day of the retreat, we sat together in a circle and we shared what our highlights were. I found it hard to narrow my favourite experiences down to just a few. To know, where to even begin.
My camping space for the weekend
The program was so jam packed, that we actually had to skip some of the workshops/events. This retreat, was the very first of it's kind, so it was an experiment really. One that I must say, I was happy to be a part of.
Exploring the many ways in which we can be more present in our lives, more centered.
When we arrived we were asked to write down what our intention was for the Retreat. This was mine ......
My intention for this retreat, is to surrender fully to the flow of abundance and open myself up to receive that which I desire.
We practiced many exercises, to help us be more in the now and we were encouraged to continue them after we returned home. One of those exercises took me by surprise at first.
Each morning we would gather together and ground ourselves, closing our eyes and checking in with our bodies. Then we would usually sing or jam together. On the second morning though, instead of singing we were instructed to take a walk in nature and complain. Not internally, but to use our voices and express our dissatisfaction at life itself.
"What have I got to complain about", was the first thought they come into my head and also was this really how I wanted to start my day off. I'm well aware that how we choose to start our day, really frames the rest of it for us. So I try to be mindful about what I do. So it was no surprise, that I felt some resistance towards this exercise.
But then I took a deep breath in and reminded myself that I need to trust this process.
So off I went, walking further into the valley, where I found a outcrop I could climb up onto and sit. The view was stunning and at first it felt kind of wrong to be complaining in this beautiful place.
But then I thought about the amount of people that have so little respect for nature and from that point forward the complaining flowed. I expressed all my frustration and anger that I felt towards those who use our natural world like a commodity. Who won't think twice about dumping their waste onto the earth or into the water.
The volume of my voice increased as I screamed out, about all the injustices that occur within the world. Towards nature, towards animals, towards us humans. How the human world has become so segregated. With so many of us pity against one another, because of what we choose to believe in, because of the way we look or what faith we follow. I screamed for everyone to wake up to the deception and instead focus on creating unity.
I screamed and screamed and it felt so good. All around me, I heard others scream out too. Our voices booming down the valley.
Then my complaining, became more personal, more intimate. Why my sister was taken, why she had to suffer. Why my girls, have a father who is not present. Why I have a friend who continues to go down a destructive path, no matter how much I try and support her. Yes I know, it is her choice, but it really pains me to see her suffer.
Just like it pains me to watch my girls grow up with an absent father, especially when they share their unhappiness about it with me.
Then I heard the call to return and as I made my descent, I felt lighter. This is definitely something I will continue practicing, at least once a week. The amount of relief I felt, was really amazing. If you haven't tried it, I recommend that you do.