i know how does it feel like. you can't even imagine you'll suffer for them, you only want them live well, you don't mean to hurt them in any way and when you realize about what you are feeling you can't see them as a dog anymore. For me, my family is very important, I can see for your words Bonzer had an incredible mom and Chaser is a lucky one for had being found for you guys. I really hope you can adopt another member for your family and create new and beautiful memories, I'm pretty sure you'll never forget your walkthrough with Bonzer but surely you still have love ti give. Thank you for sharing your memories with me, not many people can understand this, what hanppened to me with Sammy was for real, and since then I couldn't had another dog.