I am back again with my habit formation of narrating what I read so that it can be kept in my memory. As part of the book club activity we are doing, our assignment is a) to read 2 pages each day and b) to recall and narrate what we read. I always have my kid do this in our daily lessons and we are reaping the fruits of this teaching method. She is learning a lot faster than ever, and she is enjoying it. Narrating back what you just read may be just a simple task but if you try it at least once, you'll see that it is difficult but it is effective. I have my husband to listen to me every time I need and want to narrate back. But sometimes, he just seem like he's just letting me talk just so I can get it out of my system and then nothing. Haha. I don't really blame him. He has a lot in his mind and really, I think that's just how husbands are. They're too used to the voice of their wife, they just let it play on the background.
So now, I am doing some of my narrations here in my blog. Hopefully my ramblings here does help someone out there with their homeschooling journey. If not, then, this just serves as my avenue for my retelling of what I understood in the book I am currently reading.
We are still reading about the sacredness of a child's personality. I have talked about maxima reverentia devetur pueris which simply means that we should give our children the highest respect. I have also shared about the different factors that may affect how a child shows (or hides) their personality - Fear, Love, Suggestion, and Influence.
The principles of authority and docility are limited by the respect due to the personality of children which may not be encroached upon whether by the direct use of fear or love, suggestion or influence, or by undue play upon any one natural desire.
-Charlotte Mason
The last part of that statement says or by undue play upon one natural desire.
Did you know that children are born with these natural desires? We all know (and may have noticed early on) that our children naturally desires their parent's approval. They smile and show contentment when they see that their parents are happy with what they did. When a baby first stands up or first says a word and hears the people around them celebrate, did you notice that they will do the same thing again so they can get that same reaction? Children particularly wants to please the mothers because basically, they carry the food.
More often than not, parents stimulate this natural desire of approval to motivate their children to study hard, do their chores, become responsible persons. And children carry that stimulation until they are grown ups. They end up looking for approval anywhere they go. They seek the nods of their professors, the pat on the back of their bosses, and worst, the approbation of their partner. They forever seek a master whom they can please. With the social media usage nowadays, likes and hearts sometimes bring them that approval they so long for.
Another natural desire that a child has is the desire to always be the first. To always be on top. To always be the best. I guess this also roots from the desire for approval. But once this is far more advanced than just gaining approval from their idol or master. Children seek to be the first one to be noticed. That's natural, and that's normal - especially when one grew up with a lot of siblings.
I grew up in a competitive environment. I loved it when I am in the top section, in the top 10. I love it even more when I bring home medals from quiz bees. It shows I bested all the best students in that competition. Overstimulating this desire of excelling though could be too detrimental to a child's development. Imagine talking to someone who always aims to prove to everyone that they are always right or that their way is always the best.
Children also has that natural desire for power or ambition. Another way that parents and teachers motivate children into doing what they need to do is by using the child's ambition. There is nothing wrong with this, only when it becomes the only drive for that little person does it become harmful. Afterall, it is man's natural desire for power that the world was explored by Magellan, Columbus, the Phoenicians, and all the other explorers. But it is also because of ambition that led Lycurgus into training young Spartan boys into the soldier's camp.
One more natural desire that the book taught me was a person's natural desire for belongingness. Each one of us, grown ups and children alike seek the comfort of community and society. There's a reason why friendships and alliances are formed. We all desire to be with our tribe. It is essential that the child socialize, yes. But it is also necessary that they be exposed with people whose delight is in gaining more knowledge and talking about ideas. I grew up in the slums. I was surrounded by people whose only goals in life is to wake up, look for ways to put food on the table, sleep, and then do the same thing over again the next day. I am grateful that I met people in my life that shared the same ideas that I have and views the world a lot differently than my neighbors. But had I belonged to a group of friends whose idea of fun are those that destroy the body and the mind, I would be a very different person now.
Charlotte Mason further discussed in this book that out of all those natural desires, the only one we, parent educators, need to stimulate is the child's natural desire for knowledge. Yes, we may stimulate their desire for excellence, for power, for friendship and belongingness, for approval but these desires are not as sufficient as a child's curiosity.
Children are born with all the curiosity they will ever need. It will last a lifetime if they are fed upon a daily diet of ideas.
-Charlotte Mason
All children want to know everything about the world around them. That's the reason why they always ask those most unexpected questions at the most unexpected moments. Sometimes those queries get a bit too tricky and challenging but my daughter's natural curiosity, her natural desire to know what is has kept our homeschooling journey going for the past few years.
My daughter doesn't have those honor roll goals, nor do we push her to do great in her exams. We don't have medals and awards. During exams, our last words before she starts would be "Have fun!" Because we are fostering her love for learning, her desire of knowing. And that, I think, is the only desire that we should stimulate to make our homeschooling journey sustainable, effective, and enjoyable.
