A spontaneous post about my feelings right now

Hello everybody! 😊

How are you doing? I hope you had a good week and you will have a great weekend!

To be honest, this is a spontaneous post, because I am quite frustrated today.
I had this point alot in my life, it keeps coming back, where I question myself, if it´s really worth time and all this hard work what I do?

Let me explain...

I try to put ALOT of efford into my projects, no matter if it´s songs or artwork or NFTs or blog posts, or whatever. I am very passionate about what I do, so I put alot of time into it. Even if that means, I work 14 hours a day and barely sleep. It sometimes takes me 1-2 hours only to write my blogpost and make it look nice.
This is my own choice, and that´s fine, I decided to do so! No one forces me.

But there are days, where I really lose my faith in myself, or in my ideas. I ask myself if all this does even make sense what I do...
And I feel a strong desire to just stop with everything, because it´s so frustrating at some days.

I could never stop, I love what I do too much. But having to bear with this feeling is really exhausting. This little demon sitting on my shoulder, whispering me that what I do is just bullshit. It´s hard to fight against these demons. Most of the times I try to welcome my demons, understand what they want and what I need to learn from them. It works better than a few years ago, but at some days, I still lose the fight, like today.

I did not have a very good day today anyways, but I think what was the last straw that broke the camel's back was, seeing people beeing much more successful, having more reach, a higher reputation, who just post the same ad to clickbait stuff each day, or they all talk about Will Smith´s slap.

Me, who really tries to bring my ideas to life, to make ORIGINAL content which is not stolen from others or just a cheap ad to make people pay or sign up with their email address, feels as if this is all worthless.

I know most of the time, it´s just a feeling which is not true and which I just need to control. But seeing downvotes on my original content or getting a bad reputation in some tools I use, is really making me sad and I just wanna crawl under my blanket on my sofa and stay there forever... 😔

Besides all this, it was really frustrating today, logging into Listnerds (a marketing tool I started using a few weeks ago) and seeing they implemented a reputation system - which is a great idea in general. But seeing I have a reputation of 25, which is about almost the lowest you can get, and now earning alot less for the same I do than I did before, when others who post the same clickbait ad 3 times a week or talking about Will Smith´s slap have a reputation score of 50, is very very abasing.

That was the point were I asked myself, if it does even make sence what I do?

So posting about any shit happening in the world is much more interesting to people and give you a better reputation than beeing creative, hard working and trying to bring something new to the world.

I was thinking about only posting kitten videos from now on. Because I am pretty sure, that would give me more reach, attention and reputation than what I do, and for what I work my ass off since years, 7 days a week.

For me, this is kind of a very sad world. Maybe it´s just because my sight on things is very negative today. But sometimes, you don´t have any more strength to go on. You don´t feel as if the world needs your ideas and stuff. These are the days when I just want to give up and do nothing anymore.
And I often think, this might be the better alternative, than working your ass off and beeing beaten by clickbait ads.

I am sorry if I offended anyone! That is not my intention. But I guess, I will never understand this world were art and original content is worth so little to people.

I am very sorry if this dragged you down. I also didn´t want this. But it just helped to get this out of my head, even if nobody would read it. Well, everybody sometimes has these days, and we all have our demons. For some they are smaller, for some alot bigger or powerful. Nevertheless, I hope to be able to clam down my demon soon again...
I hope you are not mad now, cause I dragged you down.

On these days I am so thankful for having friends like Hive account@cryptoniusrex, who made my day a little bit better today! 💜 Thank you!

Best regards,

RAVEN 🐦

Raven Divider2.png

I am very thankful for everyone who supports me on my journey!!

Buy RAVENCOIN and get access to the fanclub!	Join the Reign of the Raven Queen on Discord!

Read about the project here	Become a resident of the Reign

Buy my NFT collections on ATOMICHUB	Buy my NFT songs on NFTTunz

Follow Socials and Side Projects	Listen to and buy Music	Use my Referrals
Twitter	Audius - Emanate	Listnerds _{Awesome email marketing tool!}
Hive Music Video Foundation	3Speak - Odysee	Rising Star Game _{P2E Game on Hive}
Brain Candy	Bandcamp	Doctor Who _{NFT game made by BBC}	get

A spontaneous post about my feelings right now - You cannot always be happy and shining

Hello everybody! 😊

Let me explain...

I did not have a very good day today anyways, but I think what was the last straw that broke the camel's back was, seeing people beeing much more successful, having more reach, a higher reputation, who just post the same ad to clickbait stuff each day, or they all talk about Will Smith´s slap.

So posting about any shit happening in the world is much more interesting to people and give you a better reputation than beeing creative, hard working and trying to bring something new to the world.

I am very thankful for everyone who supports me on my journey!!