Hello Hive users, thanks for conducting another contest.
First thing that comes to my mind when you say confidence: not everyone has the same confidence as others or peers. During my childhood experiences, I did not care much about what I say or do. Whenever my parents told me to do this or that, I just followed them. Confidence is something I have had to learn for many years. Until now, I’m still learning every time I encounter new things.
I was exposed to many camps where I needed to stand in front of all the campers, sharing the experiences and the lessons I learned during the camp. In a small group discussion, I’m okay with that kind of setup. I usually don’t feel nervous or afraid of making any mistakes. When I’m in a big group, my heart races like crazy. I can’t compose my thoughts, and my whole body is shaking, thinking what if I don’t deliver it well.
During camping, my confidence slowly adapted as I participated in group discussions. I was singing, dancing, acting in drama, and doing other activities. I realized I’m in control of my own emotions. I slowly accepted and trusted myself.
After a long period of time not attending any camp, my confidence was failing me again. My mom was a leader who trained champions for HIV and AIDS. She was encouraging young people in our church to be part of this group called Redhat. Sometimes, it wasn’t only that—she also invited foreigners to join the team. When Redhat started, my elder sister was part of this group, and I wasn’t. For many years, my mom was encouraging me to join them, and I always begged not to be part of it. She was a little sad about it. But with her persistence in asking me, one day I said yes. I wasn’t sure if I was an effective communicator to touch any student to be the voice of awareness and to stop the spread of HIV and AIDS. I rattled most of the time. I was afraid to show my face in front of hundreds of students. I was afraid I couldn’t communicate well or deliver my piece in an excellent way—the pressure to be a role model to those champions so they can have confidence to talk to their classmates and outside the school.
I was afraid I would say something wrong and become a laughing stock. My problem was that I doubted my ability and did not trust myself that I could do it. My hesitation was affecting my whole aura to face all the challenges that could build my confidence to be better in communicating and how I present myself in larger settings.
My confidence started improving when I was receiving compliments from the group and those students I was handling during sessions. It helped me feel good about myself that I did something good not only for myself but for others. Sometimes fear is only in my mind, but true confidence is when I can stand whatever circumstances I may encounter in my life. I will no longer be afraid—not until I try it first.
When I was working and I was alone in my office, not practicing my oral communication or talking to a big group of people, just handling papers and other administrative tasks, my fear of talking to a group of people came back again. My office let me handle the schedule for live streamings, reminding people about their schedules. Sometimes, on the spot, they had emergencies and events to attend. It was hard to find a replacement because it couldn’t be stopped. I would be blamed, so I didn’t have a choice but to be the replacement for that day. I was camera shy. I was afraid to say something wrong because of lack of preparation. My confidence kept challenging me. In every situation, you always learn and find yourself becoming comfortable with the things you might do.
Every time you encounter difficulties, choose to trust yourself over and over again, things are not always applicable to others.
When the moment comes that I’m doubting myself that I can’t do things, I go for an adventure in an amusement park. I pick the scariest ride, go hiking, jump into waterfalls, and go free diving. It keeps reminding me not to fear what I cannot see, but to believe in myself. Everything is possible if you accept your true potential and keep reminding yourself not to stop because you can do it, and put yourself in that situation for you to win back that confidence over and over again. There is no challenge in life that is too difficult for me—the power of trusting and accepting yourself will make my wings fly like an eagle.
Thanks for reading my post.
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