Here we are again, here I am again, having a blog after more than ten years of not having one.
Not that that blog doesn't still exist; it sure was there the last time I checked, though I no longer use the email address connected with it and would be unsure at how to regain admin credentials. I'd have to try, I suppose, and I haven't. That was the blog that I kept after college. I was pretty consistent with it, even looked forward to writing every night, though at the time I didn't consider it writing. I was just having a blog.
Why did I stop? What always stops my creative momentum: i was dating someone. I blogged during that time, but it was less and less. This was 2005 - the days before most people used facebook (though I had been using The FaceBook for over a year at that time (just want to point out for you how cool I am, I used facebook before everyone else and while it was still called The FaceBook)).
Anyway, what prompted me to start writing again in blog format here, is honey.
Last night I made an infusion for myself and my roommate. Ginger, catnip, hot water, then squeeze in lemon and add honey. Stir. Enjoy.
Normally I would have asked him if he wanted honey and most likely he would have said no. Last night I added some without asking if he wanted any. I added less honey to his than I had to mine, because I hadn't asked if I wanted it, and once you add too much honey you can't take it back and it ruins whatever you're drinking.
This morning he told me he liked it.
I think the reason I am in the habit of asking people whether they would like honey, or sugar, or maple syrup, or whatever condiment goes with whatever we're about to eat, or the reason I leave them to condiment it themselves, is that I am highly sensitive. Texture is very important to me. Balance between textures while eating food is very important. For example, tossing a salad with dressing is a chore so I prefer the restaurant to do it - but everyone kind of has their own gauge as to how much dressing is too much dressing, so most of the time I either try my luck or ask for the dressing on the side. It's about fifty-fifty. The last caesar salad I ate had bits of lettuce swimming in dressing at the bottom. I cannot handle an over-dressed salad, though nor do I like sending food back when I am hungry, nor do I like wasting it, so usually I make do with the consequences of my decision not to ask for the dressing on the side. (I don't really know why anyone would add too much dressing to a salad - I assume they're not paying attention while they're preparing the food, or they're not having empathy for the people about to eat it, or they could give a shit less about the work they are doing... but the truth could also be that maybe I'm unique in not wanting my salad to drown in dressing.)
So that's why I don't normally add honey or cream or sugar to things I offer to people. Because I don't know how they like it. And I don't like the feeling of not knowing how they like it. And even if I asked them how they liked it, I would probably still not feel like I got it right, so it is always better to err on the side of letting people take responsibility for their own tastes.