I am in Berlin now, since the day before yesterday. At my arrival, I was picked up by @Mayb - aka Meike B - and since then, she and I have talked A LOT.
Uptil now, I hardly filmed anything though,while my intention was to make a micro documentary about her.
She actually asked me about that this morning and it made me think.
There are numeral reasons for it - and I don't necessarily feel like naming them (all) - but, it made me ask myself the following question:
Who am I doing this for?
I am really starting to wonder, if I'm doing all this - the traveling, meeting new people and making a movie about them - actually more for myself, than for others. Something that seems to be the exact opposite of what I talked about in my 4 previous posts starting with:
"I want to hear your story"
Do I really want to hear other people's stories?
I say I do, but I tend to interrupt others all the time.
Meike made me very aware of that today, screaming:
"Vincennnnnnnntttttttttt! aarrrggggghhhhh!!!! Let me finishhhhhh!!!
when she was saying something but my ever active mind started interrupting her with my talk.
Now I know that she's under a lot of pressure - as she needs to leave her apartment in a month and hasn't found another place yet - but she's right. I do this all the time - the interrupting - and she made me aware of that fact today. This habit of mine makes it look/ feel like my stories are more important than other peoples stories. It's a habit that I find very hard to get rid of. It's a habit after all ;>)
An Exercise in Listening
On the other hand, I feel I am pretty good at getting people to talk to me/ open up to me. This usually happens after I open up to them myself, sharing my stories with them. That is one of the main reasons why, after having worked on fiction projects for 7 years in a row, I thought that I should perhaps start making documentaries for a change.
Making documentaries has been on my list for many years.
Do I want to tell 'My' Story?
Being confronted - once again - with this tendency to interrupt other people while they are talking, I can't help but wonder if it's perhaps true that - right now - my need to share my stories with others is even stronger than the need to share other peoples stories.
Do I perhaps want others to listen to me and my stories instead? Am I hoping for some kind of advice that they can give me on what to do/ where to go with my life? I actually doubt that, as I am a stubborn creative who likes to make his own decisions, no matter how long they take.
Long story short (a way of interrupting my own stream of conscious/ talking/ writing)
I feel like I should keep moving, try to not overthink things too much (story of my life) and keep doing what feels right.
There's a voice in my head that tells me that my next destination should be Madrid and I feel like I might actually go there next week. But who knows, I am always open for opportunities...
TO BE CONTINUED
Are you a Steemian in Madrid and do you feel like hosting me? Or perhaps share your story with me and listen to my stories... then get in touch. Y no te preocupes, yo hablo español ;>)
Images are taken by me, with a GoPro Hero 5 Black.
Both are taken at the "Wuhlheide"
on the second one you see @MayB