Those of you who have been following me for a while, know what I have been through. I wrote about it in a couple of posts now and explained how it was for me to deal with clinical depression, severe agoraphobia, and panic disorder. It was a rough time and there were months of hospitals, heavy medication and plenty of self-healing involved. If you have no idea what I am talking about, here are posts for you to check out:
Personal journey to a land of mental disorders and back
Panic attacks - a heart-attack monsters
Science behind "THE CHANGE" and why are we so good at procrastination
THE BRAIN talking about A BRAIN
Today, encouraged by the #ihaveanxietytoo challenge, I will talk about what remained after I got better. Some light anxiety remained and some PTSD. #ihaveanxietytoo is about speaking about anxiety and sharing our personal stories and remedies, helping each other and educating people about this. It is a worthy initiative and I encourage you to search for other posts under this tag.
The last time I talked with my psychiatrist, he told me I have PTSD from my disorders and how my anxiety is triggered by it. I was so traumatized by what was going on that anxiety comes from the fear it will all come back. This is also the reason why I still avoid everything that used to give me panic attacks. I have not had potato chips for two years because my first panic attack happened when I was eating them. Yes, those two things are not related at all but anxiety has nothing to do with rational fears now, does it? :)
Anxiety disorder is a term that includes several disorders. It can be panic disorded (had that), social anxiety disorder (had that one too), generalized anxiety disorder (yup, that too), Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) (my current companion), and Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) (the only one that I did not have). Anxiety disorder has a lot to do with you brain, to be more precise, your synapses and hormone production. Like any other ilness, this too can be treated and there are people who do get better.
Almost all anxiety disorders include the following symptoms:
- Dizziness and tense muscles
- Panic and fear
- Problems with sleeping and nausea
- Heart palpitations and shortness of breath
- Not being able to stay still
- Tingling hands or feet
As for the causes, the jury is still out on this. There has been a decent amount of scientific research and the conclusion is that there are several factors involved, from genetics through changes in your brain and environmental stress to faulty circuits in the brain (synapses).
It is normal to experience occasional anxiety
According to the World Health Organization (WHO), 1 in 13 people globally suffers from anxiety with the major depressive disorder and social phobia being the most common anxiety disorders. What is troubling is that only about one-third of those suffering from an anxiety disorder receive treatment. This was always a fun fact to me since these disorders can be treated pretty successfully. I guess people refuse to be treated because they refuse to admit they have a problem in the first place and even when they do, it is really easy to give into depression and conclude how nobody understands you and there is simply no cure for you. Do not think like that, please do not.
I appreciate that some people can go through this without modern medicine, good for you. I, on the other hand, love scientific breakthroughs that allowed us to stop pain with pills. Pills are great. I have had my share of alternative medicine and I do have great experiences with it but I would never trade classical medicine for it or vice versa. I think we can benefit from both of them. I KNOW we can. I love how we are able to take the best from both sides, the natural one and the one that comes from the laboratory. You know me, everything is made of electrons so everything is natural :)
Treatment for these disorders is a mix of medication and psychotherapy, I added some other things to the mix too, anything that felt good actually, from shiatsu massages and meditation to plant remedies and I had great results. I was taking antidepressants and anxiolytics for a year and am still in therapy. The huge breakthrough that I had was that I WANTED TO BE BETTER. If my doctor told me to jump on one leg and act like a chicken in order to be better, guess what, I would. This is because I found a medical expert I could trust who had great references and results in his field of expertise.
People who want
to be better,
WILL
be better.
It really is as simple as that. It does not go away overnight but it does go away. Critical thinking is crucial here, sure, your emotions are important too but if you want to get better you will have to think more than you feel. I did a lot of research and tried almost anything. I was determined to get better and so I did. I am absolutely positive that anyone can get better, ANYONE. It is only a matter of taking responsibility for your life and avoiding excuses. Excuses are easy and giving up is easy. If you want results, you will have to do some work.
Be better today
than you were yesterday.
Take it one step at the time and try different things. There are many antidepressants on the market and they are not the same, not all of them will work for you. Consult your doctor and find the one that is best for you. There are also many therapists out there, not all of them will suit you, find the one that you feel comfortable with. There is also so much you can do to help yourself, do some research and seek comfort in nature. You will be surprised how good fresh air, woods and some plants will make you feel.
Let's get one thing straight, the only thing you have to fix is your brain. You have to fix your synapses. Medication alone with no work will not do the job. There is no medication in the world that can help you if you are stubborn in your thinking patterns. Cognitive behavioral therapy can do wonders for you here if you are one of those that repeat sayings such as Nothing can help me or There is no cure. By repeating these statements you are refusing to get better and guess what, you will not.
Our brains get stimulated all the time and we have our senses to thank for that, all of them. We often forget how beneficial a right amount of stimulation can be. Before I continue, let's go back to synapses again. You can read all about them in my previous posts but just to keep it short, they are the reason why you think the way you do. When you repeat a certain thought a number of times, it becomes the truth for you. This is not some mumbo-jumbo, this is how your brain works.
Train your brain to be positive,
work on your synapses.
When you were little and you were learning how to tie your shoes, you had some troubles in the beginning. You had to repeat certain actions and concentrate to get it right. Over time, your need to concentrate became smaller and eventually, you could do the job with no thinking at all. It was natural to you. This is because you have learned it and do you know what learned it means? It means you have created strong enough synapses for it. Your thinking pattern was created the same way. Your opinions and fears were strengthened in the same way and you have a choice here; will you strengthen them further or will you "break them up" and "create new ones"?
Use all your senses
I was lucky enough to have a great doctor who explained to me how I need to get my serotonin levels up and gave me some good advice on how to do it. He told me to stimulate my brain and do things that made me happy. Just be happy was the stupidest and the best advice I have ever gotten and so my journey to happiness begun, by doing the things that made me happy and I used all my senses for that. Green, green and more green was the key for me. From green food and drinks to spending time in nature and walking barefoot, dancing and singing.
Stimulating all your senses means you have to smell good scents, listen to beautiful sounds, look at gorgeous things and eat delicious food. I also tried Movement Medicine and Shaking Medicine of old tribes to get my body to move and started exercising and dancing. I meditated every day and jumped around every day. I did it all and all of it helped. All of it stimulated my hormone production and those "stubborn" synapses.
No one can help you if you do not decide to help yourself first. You can not do it alone but others can not do it without you. A certain amount of synergy is needed and your determination. Repeat positive actions and thoughts every day. Those can be different for you than they were for me, find what works best and what makes you happy and stick with it. Your brain will be fixed in no time. Here are some simple things that helped me:
- MEDICATION
- THERAPY
- listening to loud HAPPY music
- dancing and jumping around, shaking
- plant scents, especially lavender
- meditation
- green food
- massage oils
- shiatzu massage
- yoga
- bubble baths
- painting with my fingers
- sewing toys
- walking barefoot
- swimming
- hiking
- vegetable juices
- solving math problems
- doing sudoku puzzles
- reading
- EDUCATING MYSELF about anxiety
- LEARNING about human brain and synapses
- writing
Therapy has come a long way, medicine has come a long way and modern way of communicating has come a long way. In this day and age, you will remain in your problems only if you chose so. I know it may sound harsh but it is the truth. I am not saying that it can be fixed overnight, nothing can. There are no magical miraculous cures, only strong will and determination. You have all you need to be better.
You have your brain, use it.
You are a strong enough person to get through this and I believe in you. When no one else does, remember that I BELIEVE IN YOU and if it means anything at all to you, I KNOW YOU WILL BE BETTER. I TRUST YOUR ABILITIES. You are a wonderful person and there is nothing you can not do when you decide so. Enjoy every day and try to be a little better today than you were yesterday. Try to be better tomorrow than you were today. You are amazing and you are loved. You are so loved. Trust your doctor and trust yourself. Trust the nature that surrounds you and has so much to give. I am sending you love and happy thoughts, you decide if they will help or not ;)
Until next time:
KEEP YOUR SMILE ON!
If you are interested in learning more about this subject, check out these references:
What Are Anxiety Disorders? from webmd.com, writen by Smitha Bhandari, MD
Understanding anxiety from adaa.org
The synapse from khanacademy.org
Synapse from britannica.com
