Infidelity is a distorted, misleading presentation of the reality of a relationship. The infidel partner builds a fake couple life, maintains an illusion, assures the partner cheated by his presence and availability when this is not true.
Infidelity can be seen as an escape from the relationship, "I am not here for you", "We do not build together". We can be unfaithful in a sexual relationship, but we also talk about infidelity when we choose to go to someone other than our partner or partner to get attention, to share our intimate thoughts, to validate our male or female insecurities.
Emotional infidelity*, flirting up to a point, may seem harmless, real or virtual, the close, even non-sexual friendship between a man and a woman, hurt, take from the good energy of the relationship, destabilize it. Infidelity, sexual or emotional, therefore represents any real or perceived threat to the relationship of trust between the partners, and translates into actions that threaten to dissolve the essential attachment of the two.
Few events in the couple can be as devastating as revealing an extraconjugal relationship. For the cheated partner, life as he knows no longer exists. Moreover, what he has experienced turns out to be not real, he himself is in danger of not knowing who he is.
*Infidelity once revealed and known is lived as an intense form of betrayal: trust, the past of the relationship, what we have built together, dreams, expectations, promises.
If before you had to surprise your partner in bed with another person to convince you that he was cheating on you, here, in the Internet age, the situation is radically changing. Infidelity gets a new definition, more correctly said, it broadens its classical definition and gets an extra meaning called micro-cheat, making it a clear difference between traditional infidelity and online infidelity.
Psychologist Martin Graff, a professor at South Wales University, says it was modern, allowing you to be infidel with greater ease. However, between classic style deception and internet cheating is a big difference, the consequences can be the same, he says.
Researchers in Psychology define micro-deceit as the online interest given to another person, and gestures are categorized somewhere between the limitations of friendship and flirtation: "It can be something very simple, such as appreciating a person's pictures on Instagram, repeatedly, or publicly commenting on the pictures someone on Facebook. Many of the human relationships have moved online, "says psychologist Martin Graff.
According to psychologists, the signs of micro-cheating can be: adding a former partner to social networks, compliments made online, sending emoticons that suggest appreciation, a category that includes hearts, flowers, embellishments, kisses, or saving on the phone to someone under another name. Also, other actions that can be categorized as digital cheat include: frequent checking of the Instagram page of an opposite person, or initiating conversations by sending online messages without the partner knowing, eventually deleting them.
Basically, today, thanks to the internet, a person can track the partner's activity online and can then figure out whether it is loyal or not. "It has never been easier to monitor your boyfriend's behavior. There is so much information online on websites like Facebook and Instagram that you do not even have to dig deep, "concluded Martin Graff, a psychologist.
This study was also reinforced by earlier statements by other researchers who argue that an intimate discussion with another person in the online environment is a sign of infidelity. On the other hand, a previous study conducted in 2015 pointed out that intense social networking can spark jealousy from the partner.
References
Graff, M.G. (2017) 'Tinder and location based dating' In Hughes K. A. (ed.) Romantic relationships: 17-32. Nova Science, Hauppauge, NY.