Hello my gorgeous lovelies.
So, I am sitting here sipping my tea and trying to think of how to process the hate that seems to flow from people in this day and age. (does that make me old?)
A friend of mine shared a photography page that is trying to celebrate the beauty of women and empower self love, in fact, its known as ' Project Self Love'. And while the photos are beautiful, and the message is strong. Taking the time to read through the hundreds of comments left me shaking my head trying to work out just why there are those that even in the most life positive of forums, feel the need to insult and attempt to destroy others.
Essentially the project is a collection of photos of women of all shapes and sizes in their underwear holding up signs with quotes of things that have been said to them by other people, and also something they take pride in about themselves. The women are all different ages and sizes. They are all beautiful, inside and out. Some of the things that had been said to these women are 'If only the outside matched the inside', 'no one will ever love you' and 'you would be so much prettier if you lost weight'. There was even a wonderful mature lady who said she's been told she is 'too plain to be pretty' and I gotta say that lady was a silver vixen.
These comments resonated with me quite a bit. At various times of my life past and present I've been told I'm ugly, that id be pretty if I wasn't fat. I've had insults yelled out at me from passing cars and even my own mother in her misguided sense of trying to make me fix myself has often told me I'm worthless, will never achieve anything and will never find anyone.
Naturally the comments were largely supporting these women, or sharing in their bravery as the few stood up with them to share stories of the abuse they have suffered at the hands of the unknown masses.
BUT
What really shocked me were the abundance of hate filled comments that completely missed the point of the project. They were full of things like 'Don't embrace being obese' 'Your Ugly' 'Why are you glorifying being fat and unhealthy' blah blah and so forth.
I myself am a larger woman. Am I happy? Not really...... But I am trying to be. When I look at articles like this one I can only think of how truly brave these women are to expose themselves to the teeth of the social animal that thrives on spreading misery. This just really showed why positive body image, regardless of your size, age or shape...and more importantly, loving yourself, is so very much the key to finding balance and happiness in your life.
But damn is it hard trying to love yourself when there are so many who never think what their cutting words really do to the people who become their victims.
Why is it that there are still so many people who feel it is their right to rip others down for trying to find happiness and embrace self worth. Is it because deep down those people are miserable with their own lives so abusing others is the only outlet they have? Is it the only means they have to deal with their own feelings? And why do we tolerate it? Why do we let these hateful people get away with bullying just because its on the internet. Or because you don't know the poor person being shamed.
Wether its body shaming, slut shaming, sexual orientation shaming , racial, cultural or situational. Whatever the case might be. It is NOT ok to bully others and it should not be tolerated. There is no excuse. There are thousands of young lives around the globe that become so damaged because of cruel comments and thoughtless actions.
Its 2016. How about treating others as you would like to be treated? How would you feel if your wife, your sister, mother or goddess forbid your daughter or son was treated the way you treat the women or men you have no qualms about attacking? (I say 'you' in direction to the idiots that feel their comments are smart or witty rather than spiteful and harmful)
I know it will likely fall on deaf ears, but I urge you to think before you type. Consider before you speak. And rethink before you raise a hand to cause pain. I don't want to police your opinion, but on behalf of those who stay silent and hide themselves away so not to intrude upon your vision, kindly shove your opinion where the sun don't shine and keep it to yourself.
I think its time to remember the concept of manners - don't have something nice to say, don't say anything.
If you'd like to check out the work of photographer Jess Fielder, you can find her work here
https://www.facebook.com/JessFielderPhotography/photos/?tab=album&album_id=1382959598387590