Being in love with life, and living systems, keeps you in perpetual heartbreak.
You are endlessly cracked open by awe and astonishment. And, by pain and loss. Sometimes, simultaneously.
It's a pity that our culture is so quick to diagnose any sign of sadness as a disorder. Sadness is a very healthy response to the state of our disordered world! Not that we should dwell in the heartbreak, but we can harvest useful things from it. Especially as creators.
The harvesting requires only patience, and curiosity. I don't host pity parties, and am a big fan of 'keep-it-moving'... but only after our feelings have been felt, and given a chance to INFORM US. That's what they do! They give us inklings and hunches about our best next steps.
We miss valuable information when we stuff and silence our feelings. Even the darker ones. Especially the darker ones. Anyway, those pharma folks have a very warped sense about the inner life. If left to them, they'd dull and numb EVERY feeling that strayed too far from meh.
Related to that, here's a lil' excerpt from a talk I gave for the Chicago chapter of Women Grow (a national organization that cultivates cannabis leaders). I'm poking fun at the absurd critique of cannabis' psychoactive effect:
In addition to my beloved partner plant, Cannabis Sativa, these 3 things have had the greatest influence on me + my worldview:
NATURE: My Mom and I lived as an innkeeping family of two, in a forested resort when I was 7, 8 and 9 years old. This set in me a strong connection with oak forests, and the creatures who dwell in them. As well as the four seasons of Michigan, and its magical lakes. For those years, I was a woodland creature, too. John Muir said, "The clearest way into the Universe, is through a forest wilderness." Both as a little girl, and as a woman, I have found that to be true.
NERVOUS SYSTEM: I was born with a neurological trait called Sensory Processing Sensitivity. About 20% of people (and 100+ other species) are born with heightened neural senses. The speculation is that it's an evolutionary safety mechanism. Sometimes it's a survival advantage to have high perceivers around, who often serve as a kind of warning sentinel... a little similar to the poor canaries that were once used in mining caves as visual warnings of danger. Basically, when they FELL DEAD from their perch, to the floor of their cage, the miners knew there was a lethal gas leak, and they had to get out quickly. But it's not entirely a burden, having a hi-def nervous system. There are plenty of sensual perks, too, as you can imagine ;-)
If you want to know more about this somewhat odd topic, or take an easy online self-assessment, check out Dr. Elaine Aron's website, http://hsperson.com She's the research psychologist who built on Jung's work on innate sensitivity. (The scientific term for this trait is, as I said, Sensory Processing Sensitivity. But the common term she gave it is Highly Sensitive Person. So, SPS and HSP are the same thing.) I'm happy to share more about this, if there's interest. Sensitive and empathic people often spend years struggling with confusion and overwhelm... thinking they are crazy, when really they are just enduring extreme responses to external stimuli. And when you consider how most urban lifestyles assault, fry and sizzle even the steeliest of nerves, imagine what it does to super refined ones.
NUMINOUS: The shaman walks between worlds and thresholds. As a resident end-of-life chaplain at a large hospice and medical system in North Carolina, I spiritually cared for people at the end of their life. Being that close to so much death instilled in me both a high regard for life, and a disgust with anything that blocks its flourishing. The most remarkable thing I have ever heard came from one of my dying patients. His family was gathered around his bed. Crying hard. Until he scolded them with this final blast. He said, "Don't you dare cry for me. There's things worse than dying, like living half-way."
**The next two posts I'd like to write fresh and share are:
"How A Psychedelic Cactus Helped Crack Open My Consciousness + Put Me On A Long, Hot Pursuit of Cognitive Liberty"; and then
"Life!... Six Months After An Ayahuasca Ceremony In Acapulco At An Anarchist Conference"
Any psychonauts out there? I believe a cultivated inner life is just as important to our personal freedom, as is blockchain technology, cryptocurrency, regenerative design/permaculture and economic vitality. There are lots of movers-and-shakers on this platform (thank goodness!). I'm more drawn to explore our beingness, but only want to do so in practical ways. So I invite you to tell me what topics, related to the inner life, you would find most helpful?
Holding Y'all in High Esteem,
Erika
P.S. Steem Team: For verification, please see my Facebook account here: https://www.facebook.com/ErikaEmpathicWriter