Look, let me be real for a second - 100% real and open. I have a vision, I’ve been working on making that vision a reality in my life and I know it’s the right thing because God has given me peace about it but lately I’ve been feeling a bit discouraged... Which is strange because I’ve been on such a high until now. I guess I just feel overwhelmed and doubt comes to haunt me sometimes. You know, you could start doubting your potential, the journey you’ve chosen and what you’ve heard from God. Even though deep down inside I know I’m doing what I’m supposed to be doing.
LET ME CLARIFY ✨
“Ok woah, hold the bus, what is this girl on about?” You might be wondering. As I haven’t really shared much about my journey with you guys and I haven’t exactly been a very open book on my blogposts which I feel should change. I want to take you guys with me on my journey through what I type out, if that makes sense? I want to share my emotions, experiences and growth with you guys day by day as I walk this path and endure the process of “the wait”.
Ok, so you might be wondering what I’m on about and what exactly I do and what path I’ve chosen, right? Well if you bare with me, I’ll cover ALL of that in this blog post. So yes this will be a long one, so go get your snacks or go pop some popcorn 🍿 so long because I’m taking you guys along for your first ride on my train today, LOL! Or you could just skim through my post to read the parts that you really want to read and know about...
MY VISION ✨
Ok, ok, ok so first things first. From the time I was a little girl I was always a big dreamer! My head was constantly in the clouds (still is👀) and I place my gifts in high priority in my life. Always have and probably always will. I’m a firm believer in the fact that your talents are the direction in which you should go in life and make a living out of it - no matter how scary that might feel to you. God has placed a gift(s) in you that you shouldn’t take for granted but that you should put into good use in order to actually make a difference in this world 🌎. But unfortunately most of us just settle for our lives and don’t chase after what we want because we’re scared, scared to live our damn best lives!
Anyways, that being said, let me tell you a bit of my story and how my vision came to play in all of this... Everything will start to make sense to you now now so keep reading while you chew on your snacks.
Throughout high school I always had more or less an idea of what I wanted to do after school. More than anything I actually just wanted to live the student life and have the freedom to do whatever I want to when I want to, I honestly didn’t really care about no degree or education as I absolutely hated just the thought of studying or books or lectures! Ugh! But because most people go to university after school and because that’s what gets applauded👏🏼 in society, it only felt natural for me to say “I’m going to university after school.” as that was what the majority was doing so it’s almost too easy to just follow the crowd and go along with the flow of what society pressurizes you to do.
I was looking into studying phsocology at a stage and then I was looking into law the next stage and then I was looking into studying forensic detective at a point too. However I kept changing my mind and wasn’t quite sure which I wanted to do and which I SHOULD do. Nothing ever felt right when thinking about it. Eventually this all lead to me coming to my last year of high school with absolutely NO CLUE of what I wanted to do the next year and stuck with a whole bunch of opinions of people telling me what I should be doing with my life. It was absolutely the most frustrating year, I tell you! I just wanted people to shut up😑. And it’s funny how the opinions would always come from the people who hate what they are doing 👀, but anyway that’s a story for another day. But obviously all I kept hearing is UNIVERSITY UNIVERSITY UNIVERSITY, “...you have to get something behind your name!”, they said! I didn’t listen. I was done listening to society.
I knew deep down inside that university was not the path for me but because I so badly wanted to live my own life to freedom, I kept wanting to go to varsity. My mother didn’t agree with me and told me university is not my path, it’s not who I am, I should focus on my talents and follow into that direction for my life. And besides there was no money for me to go to university anyway, my mother is a single mom and my father will not pay a cent to tertiary education. I was stuck. All my friends had already applied and gotten their own place and car to get going to university, and me? I still didn’t know what I should be doing with my life, I had no idea but wanted to go along with what everybody else around me was doing because that was the easy way out. That was the most comfortable thing to do. But... no doors were opening for me to go study. Absolutely NO doors!
It was in about December 2016 that only one door had opened for me for the next year and that was “The Gap”.
The Gap is a gap year programme where you basically dedicate that year to God and build on yourself and strengthen skills within yourself that you didn’t even know were there! I really really really didn’t want to do it! I couldn’t imagine spending everyday in a church, I just felt like it would be a waste of time that I could be putting elsewhere. But because it was the only thing that opened for me, I decided to do it. And that was probably the best decision I’ve made in my entire life! I grew in so many ways in that year and can now totally see why that was the only door that opened for me! I’m so glad all the other doors were shut. I grew in confidence, self-awareness, self-esteem and saw myself completely differently. I’m not burdened with all those insecurities I used to carry around with me and it’s enabled me to take opportunities that I wouldn’t have taken if it wasn’t for that year of self growth. I can confidently say that I NEEDED that year to carry out what God has in store for my life. The life and the vision he’s given me requires a hell LOT of confidence! I would’ve never been able to carry out Gods vision for my life if it wasn’t for The Gap, not because I didn’t have the skills but because I didn’t have what it takes inside but now I do. And after that year of a whole bunch of tough decisions and sacrifice that I had to make, God said “You’re ready”. 🙏🏼 He planted a vision in my heart because He saw my heart wanted to follow in His will for my life.
Are you still there?👀 I’m getting to the good stuff now, I promise! Lol!
Influence, inspire through the gifts God has given me inside through the means of social media. I want to build a brand for myself where I encourage and motivate other people through a lot of struggles we probably have in common and how I overcame them and conquered them. I’m going to do this through beauty, music 🎵, fashion and my inspirational content that I put out there. I want to tell a story, bring across a message to people all over the world that brings hope and life to their lives. That will set them on fire inside to not just exist in this world but to go out there and make a difference through the gifts God has placed on the inside of them, to actually start to live, truly live.
That’s my vision. That’s my passion that burns on the inside of me. Being a Social Media Influencer who inspires the youth of today. 👯♂️
I’VE BEEN WORKING....✨
Ever since God showed me this, I’ve been working, I’ve been busy. Despite the hate, the pressure and the comments of others - I’ve been at it. I’m running purely on faith and what God has told me which is really scary sometimes because in the natural what I’m doing looks like such a dead end road to many! I’ve received comments from even family that I should go get something behind my name and rather treat this as a hobby. I get looks from people who think I’m crazy and just sitting at home snapping selfies. While in actual fact I’m working on what God has told me to do. Blindly follow Him despite what may look “realistic”. It’s not comfortable guys. In fact, it’s very uncomfortable! Sometimes it gets to the point where you think “What am I actually doing?” but those are things you have to push through. I’m currently there. In a place of despondency, thinking do I have what it takes? Will my following ever grow? Will something ever come out of this? Because look, let me be real for a second - 100% real and open. I have a vision, I’ve been working on making that vision a reality in my life and I know it’s the right thing because God has given me peace about it but lately I’ve been feeling a bit discouraged... Which is strange because I’ve been on such a high until now. I guess I just feel overwhelmed and doubt comes to haunt me sometimes. You know, you could start doubting your potential, the journey you’ve chosen and what you’ve heard from God. Even though deep down inside I know I’m doing what I’m supposed to be doing.
Go subscribe to my on YouTube, http://www.youtube.com/c/HeavenlyVids
& on instagram 👉🏼👉🏼
Peace out ✌️
