Hello Steemit,
I am Dave and I’m a quitter.
The major reason for quitting is that I am no longer interested in what I’m doing. Now, there is no problem with quitting with something you don’t like (anymore), but sometimes it can affect others in various ways by the way you quit. Plus it's a bad personal characteristic.
This major reason for quitting splits, in my case, into 3 minor reasons:
I quit just before reaching the goal
I like challenges, so for example when something is hard, I want to do it. When I start I give it all I’ve got because I’m very enthuasiastic in learning new things. When I reach 90%/95% of the goal my mind says I am able beat the challenge. My mind shuts off the interest I had and it’s impossible to focus on it anymore.
Example: I have played online poker for a while, 90% of the people lose money but I was one of the 10%. But I played at the bottom levels so my gains were really small. I was playing tournaments and I won one with around 350 competitors. I was happy because I won a “big” tournament but in the days after, my mind shut off: I couldn’t be bothered to play anymore, my mind said I reached my goal. I wanted to keep playing but I didn’t care. Even though I reached the goal of winning a tournament, my bigger goal was to win more money. But my mind didn’t want to anymore.
I quit because I feel embarassed
Everyone had their moments in life, big or small, where they felt so embarassed, they just quit with what they were doing. Maybe someone was bullying you, someone was laughing at you or people were just staring at you because you did what you liked at that moment. Or…you think they were laughing or staring at you so you felt embarassed.
Of course, the best way to cope with those things is to shake it off and move on, but not everyone is like that.
Example: Dancing! I can’t dance…or I think I can’t dance…no, I really suck at it….but I should not care!
I quit because I can’t win anymore
When I’m playing a game, I want to win. Not by cheating but the regular way. I like to outplay the opponent(s) by making smarter moves or by being more skilled. Because of this, I don’t like luck-based games but strategy-games.
But if I notice I can’t win anymore, because I messed up, I feel like I don’t care anymore. When I’m playing by myself it doesn’t matter, eventhough it is still a bad habit. But when I’m playing with/against friends or unknowns it is no fun for them if I stop playing seriously before the game finishes. Because I’m ruining their game.
Example: On holidays with my friends we always do minigolf. I know I can do it, but when I mess up 2 holes, I can’t win anymore and I start messing around. And they don’t like that. At that moment I don’t care, but afterwards I feel bad about it…not for the first time.
I wasn’t always like this. I have played badminton from the age of 7 to 27 and when I was 13/14, every tournament I played I finished in first or second place.
Somewhere along the way my focus got lost and now I have a hard time keeping interest in about everything, although I recently refound my passion for boardgames.
So, what am I going to do about it?
I like to learn new things, I have many interests but I’m always looking for more. When I find something new and interesting I give it all my attention but after a while (like a few months) the attention fades because I am bored of it. Then I move on to something new.
The great thing is, though: you will never unlearn it!
This is what I have come up with:
A monthly challenge
Every month I want to learn something new and I will put 1 hour a day in it for 4 weeks.
This doesn’t sound very hard but the last mile is the longest.
I’ve done this before to learn to play the piano again, how to use nunchuks or modelling balloons. But every time near the end I failed to keep practising. Allthough I still sometimes play the piano and create balloon-hats.
“Easy to learn, difficult to master”
Just to be clear: I don’t want to be a professional in every new skill, I want to get new insights and maybe I pick up a new hobby.
Also, it will improve my personal characteristics, which ones will depend on the current challenge.
Now, what will be my first challenge?
I picked something that is so unmanlike that people will laugh at me. But I don’t care! And I wanted to pick something that no one would guess as a first challenge.
Embroidery
Yep…that’s it. The last time I did this was at the age of 5 when I was at school. I’m interested in learning it again and this will be my first project.
I went to the hobbyshop and she advised me to start with this easy project, it will take about 3 hours to finish it. I said: “That is fine, that will be about 3 days for me and I will come back to pick up my next project”.
I will keep updates on my progress throughout the month with pictures.
My friend told me to buy a thimbleful. I said: “No, I’m a man, I don’t use that”. So when I pinch my finger with a needle, I will show that too.
This challenge is not just for me, I hope you will get the inspiration to learn something new yourself. Or you stop quitting yourself or any other reason. Please keep me updated!
There are many more things I want to learn: playing the guitar, the harmonica, painting, electrics, woodcarving.
Please post your suggestions and maybe I will pick up your challenge!
P.S. Any advice is welcome!
Dave
