Howdy readers! I’d like to introduce myself the old-fashioned way: By shaking your hands so hard that I hear bones crunching. The only problem is, I have hardly any feeling left in my hand, so I am typing this with only my left!
My name is Morin, and I like to make people slap their knees—out of laughter. Knee-slapping for the hell of it is ok too, in fact, I encourage strange behavior unless it involves not wearing any clothes at a formal engagement. That's just uncalled for!
I chose Funny and Humor to write in because business and legal writing intoxicate me so much that I might fall over dead. My posts will be different from others, they are not about original, useful, health tips blah blah blah…they are about taking a quick break from all those and draw a smile on faces!
I didn’t find many other members posting jokes and thought it would be perfect for me. So here I am! My interest is to leave a lasting impression on reader's faces in the form of a smile. A guffaw or chuckle will do too! Giggling and chortling are acceptable as well, but take it easy. People can die of laughing, you know.
I can’t wait to do a belly-flop off the high dive for you into this new terrain and create some gut-busting content. There’s a lot to look forward to, and this is just the beginning!
Would you be interested on my content? I bit you are, especially after reading the jokes below…Have fun
1- Three kids come down to the kitchen and sit around the breakfast table. The mother asks the oldest boy what he’d like to eat. "I’ll have some frickin French toast," he says. The mother is outraged at his language, hits him, and sends him upstairs. She asks the middle child what he wants. "Well, I guess that leaves more frickin French toast for me," he says. She is livid, smacks him, and sends him away. Finally she asks the youngest son what he wants for breakfast. "I don’t know," he says meekly, "but I definitely don’t want the frickin’ French toast."
2- My grandfather always said, "Don't watch your money; watch your health." So one day while I was watching my health, someone stole my money. It was my grandfather.
3- Two Amish ladies were digging potatoes in the field. One lady digs up two large potatoes bigger than her fist. She says, “Oh my! These remind me of my husband Jebadiah’s ears.” The other woman gazed in wonder and said, “You mean his ears are that BIG!” “No!” the woman replied. “There’re that dirty!”
4- A man decided to have a face-lift for his birthday. He spends $5,000 and feels really good about the result. On his way home he stops at a newsstand and buys a paper. Before leaving he says to the sales clerk, “I hope you don’t mind me asking, but how old do you think I am?” “About 35,” was the reply. “I’m actually 47,” the man says happily. A little while later he goes to McDonalds for lunch and asks the order taker the same question, to which the reply is, “I’d guess that you’re 29?” “Nope, I am actually 47.” He’s starting to feel really good about himself. While standing at the bus stop he asks an old woman the same question. She replies, “I am 85 years old and my eyesight is going. But when I was young there was a sure way of telling a man’s age. If you kiss me for about ten minutes I’ll be able to tell your exact age.” As there was no one else around the man thought what the hell and kissed her. Ten minutes later the old lady says, “OK, I’m done. You are 47 years old.” Stunned the man says, “That was brilliant! How did you do that?” The old lady replies, “I was standing behind you in McDonalds.”