Current situation... staring 40 in the face, not beliving it to be true, perfectly middle class, appearing like all of the other mothers, to those mothers... like I got my shit together. Inside I am screaming. Suffocating in so many ways, feeling so guilty and ungrateful for the blessings in this life that I have. I understand that I have so much more than others. I do not for one second think that I am so unfortunate that I should be pitied.... I feel pity for myself. How could I possibly be so restless when I have so much.... I see what I have that so many others would love to possess.... I am mrsjanesomebody. I am like all of the other mrs jane-feel-like-i-am-nobody,'s mrs.jane-doers's, jane-does, janes. I am like you and I have a story to be told.... it is time that I tell it.....