I considered going my own way, after a horrible divorce, where I found out the state would pay my ex more in child support if she never let me see them. Zero custody or shared time. Who thought of that?

At that point, I was pretty sure I would never allow the state into my personal relationships, that's for sure. If people care about each other, then fine, if they don't, sick the dogs of the state on the father... Not fair, not balanced, no recourse that's not easily sabotaged.

Just never get married, live together, make a contract maybe. If the kids are yours, you will have to pay for them, so no getting around that part, unless you move off shore.