Howdy. My name is Eric, otherwise known as The Mad Goat. I got the name Mad Goat back in 04 when I lived in Germany and was getting drunk watching a German hardcore wrestling match. We were making jokes about what our wrestling names would be and my German friend Marcus called me the Mad Goat on account of my facial hair. The name stuck and it was the name of my blog WAY back in the day on MySpace, where I had about 3k subscribers for my humorous belligerent writing. I quit blogging for about ten years while I attempted the whole “being an adult” thing. I made a Steemit account a few months ago, tossed up a few posts and then life got in the way. I’m back again because I really miss blogging and I’ve been watching my brother have a ton of fun here in this community. I never did an introduce yourself blog so here it is.
This blog is a humour relationship blog. Some advice is good, most is not. Some people might find it offensive. People with a sense of humour shouldn’t. Think of it as relationship advice from Andrew Dice Clay. I really look forward to feedback on my posts because once I have enough of them I hope to turn this into a book.
Men and women are different. This is neither good nor bad. It is just a simple fact that people for some reason have chosen to ignore because they don’t want the politically correct social justice warriors going all jihad on their asses. Your personality is based on what you experience in life and how you are taught to react to those experiences. This phenomenon can best be illustrated by the delightful 1984 cinema classic “Beverly Hills Cop,” starring Eddie Murphy and Judge Reinhold. In a nutshell, a street smart loudmouth black cop from Detroit goes to Beverly Hills looking for the guy who killed his friend. While there, he is thrust into a working relationship with a stuffy white cop who is Murphy’s polar opposite. Almost every joke in the movie hinges on the fact that we know these characters are going to respond differently to any given situation, based on their life experiences. This formula has been used a million times before Beverly Hills Cop and a million times since, because it is a universally recognized truth.
When it comes to gender we have become afraid to admit we are different. Take any set of paternal boy/girl twins who are raised in the exact same environment and you don’t even have to wonder if they are going to be raised differently or have a broadly different set of life experiences. If I get pulled over, I can’t wear a pair of tight shorts and flash my plumbs at a cop to get out of a ticket. Chicks don’t call their girlfriends when they need help moving. Men aren’t offered a shoulder to cry on unless he has cancer. The code of chivalry requires men to do menial servant shit for women like opening doors or pulling their chair out for them. Women aren’t really expected to do shit for men. They used to cook and clean, but I dare you to tell your girl dinner needs to be on the table at seven. You’re going to have a bad night. The point is that we are different, for better or worse. The good news is that once you accept these differences, you can learn to work through it, instead of banging your head against a brick wall when your girlfriend yells at you for not doing laundry; so you do it, but then you are still in trouble because, “I want you to WANT to do laundry.”
At the end of Beverly Hills Cop the characters have learned to accept their differences and pool their talents to catch the bad guy. When you enter into a relationship you are starring in a buddy movie. It is up to you whether it is going to be Beverly Hills Cop or the Odd Couple.
Men, you have grown up in a world where you are expected to act rationally and solve problems. Your girl didn’t. If you expect her to act as such, you are in for a long, hard ride. I can help you navigate these waters. I can tell you what to expect, how to respond and why. In order to do this we will need to examine the motivations and experiences of men and women, as far back as the beginning of civilization. So join me on a journey of discovery and awakening.