We have been through so much.
Might be the wrong time after court today. At the same time, it's the best time.
We have faced things I wish we had never have to go through. Ever.
The way his childhood turned out is surely not how I pictured it for him.
I kind of saw myself with a man who backs me. We raise the kids, I would go for my career and we work together and spend lots of quality time together.
Wrong.
That is NOT how it turned.
Rather, I got death threatened, he had a DVO against him and Heinrich has grown up seeing his dad on weekends with his parents going through court proceedings over him and other things ever since we separated when he was only 1 year old.
Needless to say that it takes a toll and eventually you just have enough.
And then you wake up the next morning to continue.
It is devastating.
Especially because honesty is at the top of your priority list and eventually your truth comes out.
5 years of court proceedings shines its light to the surface.
A painful truth it feels like next to realizing that you are now the single mum at baby gym classes while all others bring their husbands and partners....
Devastating even more when your believed happy end keeps being abusive and not even a co parenting relationship is an option.
How many hits can you take and recover from?
I have learnt so much.
Deep insights from people in similar situations from different positions that have helped me through and find my way back to life together with my son.
It has been an adventure to say the least and I am still wary of what I share out of fear I jincs my court case.
At the same time: how long can you hide your truth?
Hiding is exactly what makes Domestic Violence so real.
It is why it is still so difficult to detect and prove.
It's getting there but not fast enough in my opinion.
It's devastating and extremely freeing to come out the other side.
It really is. Not that I'm out yet.
When are you really out when you have children with them?
It's rather an out of the other side of another confront that leads to more expansion, love and freedom than before.
Our kids deserve a safe, free and happy childhood.
We didn't know what we didn't know.
Just because we chose this person once does not mean we have to live with abuse for the rest of our lives.
Nor do I believe that the view point that parents have a right to their children is placed over the child's right of safety and well being.
We are humans! Here to be. Not objects, here to be owned.
None of us has to suffer under the burden of Domestic Violence and Narcisistic Abuse.
It's enough.
Let's paint the picture of our now and our future bright and colourful.
Now.
Get that paint brush out!
What does your future look like?
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If you need support and insights how to raise happy children regardless of your challenges and your unmanageable behaviour of your children, need support moving through Domestic Violence and Narcisistic Abuse, please send me a message. I have a FREE support group with all the insights on how to move through it. Including court.
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