nomvula's instagram Feed : 2019/06/28 13:45:52

I am feeling vulnerable today...

It's so hot that I feel sorry for all the plants and animals, trees and even birds and bees...

I feel so hot that it feels as if even when I eat raw food it gets cooked inside my stomach...

I wish to dance with my whole heart and mind and soul and its bliss when I do but I have to wait till sunset which is at about 9pm...as if I go out now to dance I will melt away.

I see people around me that is not affected as they walk from an air con car to an airconned house to an airconned workplace... I wonder... Are they conned? Yet I wish we had an air con... The fan blows hot air and sounds like a mosquitoe on steroids... My feelings feel raw... I miss the coolness of the home I once had...

I miss my dog who I have not seen for over a year... I miss my water filter that made my water taste sweet... I miss my permaculture garden where I could eat anything at anytime, from rocket to basil of multiple types to lettuces and my stevia plant...

I miss my cacti collection of babies whom I nurtured with such love and care...

I miss my fairies that was all over my home and garden...

I miss coming home...

Driving in my own air-conditioned car...

The car I sold for such little money... I been in Italy 9 months...

Waiting for my legal paperwork to be finished...

9 months!

It's expensive here...

And very boring when one just sit and wait...

I see other refugees here that came with no paperwork,

no visa and they are helped with money and accomodation and food...

Yet I am a refugee too...

I had to say goodbye to my home country...

My home...South Africa... Sold my stuff for next to nothing...

All because I was told that I don't belong there...

I did not feel safe... Atleast my husband is Italian, so we thought best to come to Italy and get my paperwork sorted.

And you may say that atleast I had money to leave, but my money disappear quickly if one just wait now for 9 months for Italy to sort out my permission to stay here... I feel vulnerable...

I feel...

Emotional... #Italy #share2steem #permessodisoggiorno #nomvulathegreeninglady #rawfeelings #life #southafrica #legalrefugee #italygovernment #salvini #matteosalvini