It felt just like yesterday, I mean the day I collected my certificate. Imagine the joy I had in me that day...five course at that. It wasn't easy, I even had to use over five years, cause in-between I battled with illness. I held my certificate as if it was the key to the future I had been praying for. But, deep inside, I was afraid, even the way people cheered me made me feel uneasy...Everyone believed I was ready for the future ahead ..but I doubt I was.
And of a truth, I wasn't ready for it. People stop showing up for you, friends are gone, the class group that would always be filled with messages becomes silent, no more exams, no more lectures.... everywhere turns dry. And suddenly, it hit you, you're alone with your thoughts, dreams, fears, aspirations and all.
Get ready for this, as this is very unlike me, I'm well known in advising, inspiring and motivating. But I wouldn't want to waste your time with that, we need to hit things deep and be very realistic. I will try my best to not make it soooooo, you know. So, here are a few things I wish someone told me earlier...:
First of all___Nobody owes you anything.
Yeah, don't even rely on anyone who's promised you anything...a job, money to start up a business or an uncle or aunty who's promised you anything. Don't rely on that lecturer who says, your your future is bright, of a truth it is, but you have to take hold of it yourself. Don't even rely on those people who have promised to connect you. The world and all those people are busy, you must be intentional yourself, you are your own driver and you're responsible for your next move.
Secondly___ Your degree is not your identity.
I won't want to refer to it as....Just paper. What really matter now is that which you can do, that which you can learn, and how you can build. Your course might not give you what you need, but don't panic. The world gives room for learning and you have to be bold enough to start learning something new.
Thirdly____Do not despise the days of your small beginnings.
Your first job may not be your dream job, the pay might be small, that business might not yield the expected profit. You might feel uncomfortable and confused. But humble yourself and earn your way up to greatness. The road atimes might not look like it....so don't give in to pride. Climb gently.
Fourth point____ Your friends will be far away.
After school, everybody goes there way, and the way we grow is different, some are confused the same way you're,.some are already doing well and so busy, some don't just want to be seen, some are struggling, and some are even married. So, don't measure your life by someone else’s own. Be happy for others, clap for them, but keep on grinding while protecting your peace.
Fifth point____ Learn a skill.
The world we live in today only rewards problem-solvers. Be it solar installation, baking, sewing, social media management, graphics design, tech skill..... anything, just make sure to pick up something to do. School only gives you theory, the outside world comes with reality....
Sixth point____ Life is not a race.
Like I said earlier, some of your classmates might be doing well, and yours might take time. You might even need to wait longer than expected. That doesn’t make you foolish or lazy, life is turn is by turn. What matters is that you don’t stop moving, keep on growing, don't stay idle.....learn, volunteer, serve. Just don’t sit down expecting a miracle.
Seventh____Don't fall for pretense.
You might feel the urge to fake things fake it, to appear as if you’ve made it, whereas you're still struggling. Please,. don't fall for it, it is a trap. Authenticity will always last longer than pretense. Be honest with yourself, and keep building.
In conclusion, life outside school can mess with you, you'll apply for jobs and get no reply, NO will be a word you will have to get used to, you might even get to an extent where you doubt your capabilities and worth. But don’t lose yourself, keep good people close to yourself, people that will remind you who you really are, and remind you it's just a phase that will surely pass.
The truth is, I don't even remember any of my exam scores. But I remember vividly those nights I go to bed hungry, I remember those days I trek to school cause I was broke, I remember those days I cried. I also remember the small wins, the little growth, the people who helped, the friends that stayed, and the family that believed in me.
That's life for you....So, if you're stepping out of school, don't overthink, just take a deep breath and set to work. The world is so big and filled with opportunities, and instant miracles...yet it is most times unfair.
So, dear graduates be ready for it.
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