Johnathan Willard had the crowd laughing hysterically. That was his job, to get the crowd warmed up for the hilarious Mr. Mathew Mulligan.
"Everyone please welcome, Mr. Mulligan!” Johnathan Willard extended his right hand in invitation to Mathew Mulligan. The crowd hopped to their feet in excitement. They were ecstatic to see one of the very best, if not the best, comedians of all time!
"Whew,” Mr. Mulligan began, “Thank you, John. You all know he tried to get me in prison from last night’s show?” Everyone started to laugh.
"No, really. The hardest thing about being a comedian, is hanging out with another one. That guy is a riot. Everything that comes out of his mouth is hilarious. I’m constantly trying to avoid him more just so I don’t repeat any of his jokes, because of the ‘law.’” Mr. Mulligan bumped his microphone against his head while rolling his eyes. Laughter broke out in a wave from the front row towards the back.
"I mean seriously. He knows I won’t survive a day in prison. I can see it now, ‘what are you in for?’ I’d just sit there and say, ‘I’m here for purposely enforcing people to wet themselves in a dinner theatre, you know, the hardcore stuff.’” Mr. Mulligan rolled his eyes again while mocking a slight walk in pride.
Everyone of course was eating up his routine. It is always different in every show – it has to be. It was the law. Mr. Mulligan chuckled to himself, “I don’t blame him. Opening a show for me is like holding open the door for your friend getting ready to sleep with your crush.”
Johnathan Willard chuckled from behind the stage, “True, though.”
"Not that he has to worry about that.” Mr. Mulligan chuckled. “It’s always hard trying to find a woman being around a guy who is constantly in a contest for the wits when we are near one. It’s like watching two different dogs hump each leg of their owner.”
The crowd cheered excitingly. A woman laughed herself into tears from the front row. “Damn laws,” Mr. Mulligan sipped from a water bottle. “If anyone were to catch me repeating a ‘said joke,’ I’d just give them the finger and smile. While locking eyes onto the officer, all I would say is, ‘Good, count this as a fucking mulligan!”
The crowd was on their feet cheering. The entire theatre was engulfed by laughter. Mr. Mulligan chuckled to himself again. He slightly stepped back from the microphone while everyone was still laughing uncontrollably.
"Come and get me,” he winked towards Johnathan Willard.