Standing amidst the two diverging roads in a dumpy, cold forest, all senses are working yet the mind is in a still. Which way would she choose? Should she choose the less taken road? Or the one paved and mostly taken by travelers? In a world where you cannot choose two but one only, in a life of which you can only take one step forward, lest you fall, choosing the choice that is best for you can be a puzzle.
Are you on your late 20s? Then, maybe that's what you feel right now.
I'm one of you. I'm suffering from:
"Quarter Life Crisis".
I was enjoying my early twenties life - having a comfortable job at home (online ESL job) while doing missionary work, traveling to different places, studying in a graduate school, enjoying my time with friends and family - when suddenly my 25th birthday came.
It was somehow normal at first. But as the days passed by, I realized I'm heading to 26. As I turned 26, I knew I'm heading to 30. What on earth I'll be doing then?
Caption: My batchmates
First,
I sometimes wake up in the morning and ask myself, "Why am I here? Did I make the right choices?" I could still remember how my classmates rush to big cities to find good jobs. I didn't go. Why? My mother got sick and my dad was most of the time working in other places. I stayed coz' I knew I have to take care of her. Had I joined my classmates on that venture, wouldn't have I been happier?
Second,
some of my friends have found the love of their life. And I'm still here - alone. I was heartbroken before. I walked out of some kind of unhealthy friendships. I chose not to enter in an immature relationship. Did I make the right choice?
Third,
sometimes I find myself sitting alone in a bench and wondering. Where are my contemporaries? Most of the time, I work with younger colleagues. They seem to be fresh and active. I tend to blend with them and encourage them. They get so inspired. But how about me?
Fourth,
15 years from now, when mom and dad might be resting already, will I still be alone? Will I find joy in melancholy?
Fifth,
I have fears , there are many of them. Though people call me a smart-good-pretty girl, I still don't have that confidence. I still feel shaky when I talk to new people , especially those of my age. I still get scared when my education teacher tells me to do a class demonstration. And I'm not done with my lesson plan, yet!
Lastly,
I also have the fear of choosing the wrong choice. Your choice now will bring a great impact of your life. I have seen people making some big mistakes in life and suffering the consequences for a lifetime. Oh, God, please spare me!
Conclusion:
I have talked to a friend and read some blogs about Quarter Life Crisis. I have learned several things about it and have understood myself on a better view. But still, I'm struggling guys.
Traversing into an unknown path, questions of uncertainty filled my mind. I just couldn't get the right answers. I chose to submit it to God then.