I've come to some realizations when it comes to family, and those closest to me. The past couple of weeks my son was home from college for the holidays. It was very nice having him here as a distraction when my grandma passed away. It was nice having a workout buddy at the gym again as we started a new year. It was nice mentoring over snacks, meals, or during drives to the store. It was nice to have someone to talk with, and share ideas.
Tomorrow he returns to campus life, and we settle back into our routine of trying to get our renovation completed. Meanwhile his visit led me to think about things in general, and what the day to day means.
I enjoy family much more than I tell them. Sure, I embrace the peace and quiet of "alone time" as much as the next person. But typically that is short-lived, and before long I miss others being around. It doesn't matter if they are talking, making noises, or just sitting nearby. It is just the act of them being there that carries value from hour to hour and day to day.
However, I am not a very open person emotionally and therefore they don't know how I feel. I've never been good at sharing my feelings, and I'm especially terrible at showing it physically. No kisses, hugs, or touching in any way. As I grew up, it just wasn't the norm to share in these things. And unfortunately, it has carried over to my day to day life.
This is something I desire to be better at, but I'm not sure how to do it. So I will strive to do the best I can, and improve one day at a time.
I'm sure there are others out there with this same characteristic. Or perhaps there are others who have overcome it already. Please share in comments. Or perhaps create your own post and add it to a comment here. It would be greatly appreciated.
Let's share this journey to be better and more loving. Let's share in letting our families know how we truly feel, but typically keep it inside.