"We suffer more often in imagination than in reality." - Seneca"
Every now and then (or mostly everyday) we are bounded by the things that fear us. Whether it is that phone call we want to make, that person we want to get to know, financial security we always overthink before we go to bed, or even the dreams we wanted to achieve badly. All those things share that same of dreadful feeling: FEAR. Fear is good. Fear is what makes us human, and to feel fear is to feel alive. But bear in mind that too much fear isn't good for your growth and progress in life. The antidote to this paralyzing phase of life could be found in one of the most practical Hellenistic philosophy: Stoicism.
What is Stoicism, if one may ask?
Stoicism was founded in Athens by Zeno of Citium in the early 3rd century BC, but was famously practiced by the likes of Marcus Aurelius and Seneca The philosophy asserts that virtue (such as wisdom) is happiness and judgment should be based on behavior, rather than words. That we don’t control and cannot rely on external events, only ourselves and our responses.
How to control your fear through Stoicism?
1. Train Your Mind Not To Define Good or Bad Too Sudden.
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Fear, like any other emotions has its causes and roots; the inception of finding what we expect doesn't match our reality. This is where it all started. When you imagine one thing to be good, and it turns out bad, you are left with a trauma, a sense of misplaced expectation where your future point of view will be slightly distorted due to your past experience. Try not to define the good or bad of something. Instead, find a way to see that thing as it is, without judgment. From then, start making decision to and act. Avoid analysis-paralysis.
2. Take the view of 'The Seeker'
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When you seek something you really want, you are in the perpetual of the unknown. You don't have any expectation ,you are nimble and curious, you don't set limits untik you find that thing, and you are fully present, in the moment. Take your world-view and put your mental goggle as the view of 'The Seeker'. Seek and you shall find. Seek and you won't be blind.
3. Whatever can or can't happen, will happen.
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One day, we all going to die. I know it sounds cliche' but it is the cold hard truth. We all age, beauty fades, and the world will keep spinning, if it hasn't come to its end. Can we control the weather and stop the rain? We can't. Can we make turn back time and go back to the good old days when we were young and fun? We can't. But can we make tomorrow a better day to live? Can we cherish every moment and strive to find the harmony within ourselves? Yes, we definitely can. Stop focusing on the things you can't control, start controlling of all the things within your grasp.
4. Practise visualization
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What you think, is what you'll become. What you see, is what you'll set. When you have fear, you'll start to imagine all bad things, misfortunates or even worse your past that is way out of your control. What if you start to visualize your future by focusing on your present? What can you do to shape your future the way you wanted? What steps can you take to start being better in life? Visualize and practice mindful thinking. When you visualize good things, you'll be in a good mood and you'll start to do something with a positive mindset. Then, you'll see how your life turn around because karma is real. Goodness will be paid back with goodness.
5. Gratitude goes a long way. Reduce complaining. Start appreciating.
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Negative people is more likely to make positive people negative than positive people is more likely to make negative people positive. It is true. We all have spent that one time, with negative people, pessimistic about all the things he/she has, without realizing all the goods thing around that could make life better. Even worse, the time they spent complaining about what was wrong and could go wrong would be better spent to find solutions, improving their life's condition. Practice gratitude and appreciate the littlest thing in life. You'll find peace and you'll find the solution to your problems.