I no longer want to feel this way, I struggle with a few addictions, many laugh because they say they are not harsh drugs, but they disrupt my life either way. Cigarettes, which lead me to not eat, Marijuana which leads me to have no will and big eating sugar based foods and junk food which leads to rapid deterioration of my body and mind.

I had a pretty unstable upbringing, there was no lack of love, just a lack of structure and stability. It is a long story maybe for another time, but I know this sadness is originally caused by that, not there is nothing I can do about my past, all I can do is take control of these three major addictions that have been killing me slowly.

Your post was inspirational, thank you for sharing